calima

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September 05, 2005

Stupidity of man.

Last night, I went over to Sweetheart's for some lovely company and lovely mushroom risotto. I stayed until about 1am, and then began my 15 minute trek back to my house.

Now, I've lived in this neighborhood for 2 years. I wouldnt' say I know the place like the back of my hand, but I know it pretty well, and this would not be the first time I've walked home at 1am or later.

So, I decided to take the main road, simply becuase there's more traffic, more lights, etc. All the sorts of things a girl walking on her own late at night thinks about. I'm listening to my ipod, and I pass by some of the street cleaners who are working hard to keep our city tidy. They look like nice guys, and I wonder, as I pass, that if I were to approach one of them and ask for a pound for the bus home (assuming I lived further away), I bet one of them would give me one, just so they wouldn't have to see a girl walk home in the middle of the night alone.

I also considered that if someone were chasing me or going to attack, I would probably be able to approach these guys and get some help. The thought was comforting to me.

On I strolled (well, quickly strolled) thinking that I've never really had any problems walking alone at night in this neighborhood, when I see a shadow of a person walking behind me. I hate it when this happens, becuase it always reminds me of some terrible suspense movie where a woman is looking out of the corner of her eye at the shadow that's creeping up on her shadow and then she starts jogging and the shadow starts jogging, then she starts running and the shadow starts running...yeah.

Meanwhile, I'm walking up the street with a shadow following me. Instinctively, I move to the right to let the person pass me, by my calculations whoever it was was walking fast enough to catch up with me and might pass me up. Unfortunately....

'Excuse me? Excuse me....'
This young Asian man stood nearby me. I took off my earphones, thinking that he wanted a cigarette, money or directions.

'I know it's not appropriate to approach a woman on the street like this, and I apologise, I didn't mean to startle you. You're obviously scared, but I just wanted to talk to you.'

I start gesturing that he should hurry up and get to the point. I'm keeping my distance from him.

'I just wanted to talk to you becuase I think you are very attractive. I haven't seen you in any of the bars or pubs around here before, and I wanted to let you know that I find you very attractive.'

It was at this point that I halted his little speech and said, ' I've got a boyfriend.'

'But I wanted to speak to you, and let you know that...'

Here I cut him off, and as I walked tersely away I said, 'Sorry, mate' in the same tone I use for those homeless guys in the city centre who ask for money but who are way too well-dressed to be actually homeless.

I marched up the street, casually looking around to see if he was following me. He didn't appear to be, but then he did appear out of nowhere earlier.

I called Sweetheart, who was quick to jump to my aide when I told him I'd been approached by some stranger; he spoke to me on the phone until I got to my front door and then I called him when I got upstairs.

The thing that annoys me about this event is the sheer stupidity of this young man. What in the hell was he thinking bothering some woman along on the street at 1am? I don't care if I look like a supermodel, you can wait 12 hours and tell me in broad daylight that you think I'm attractive.

Secondly, what did he possibly expect would happen? That I would just say, 'Oh! Look! It's you! I'm so glad you stopped me! I don't know what your name is, but I would love to go out with you!'

Really.

When I arrived home, I sat in front of the telly, watching Britney and Kevin Chaotic and criticised my response to the guy. I should have been more rude to him, I should have been ruthless. I should have given him the what-for about approaching a woman after midnight on the street.

I also thought of a bunch of things I could have said to him (as one does) and wish I'd said instead of what I did say:

1. Fuck off.
2. Are you kidding me? Go away.
3. You're sorry you startled me? How about I call the police and see what they think about that?
4. (just kept walking)
5. (just kept walking)
6. (just kept walking)

Ugh. What a jackass. I'm so annoyed.

Guys... listen up: You need to be more sensitive when walking down the street late at night behind a woman. Either hurry up and pass her or cross the street so she knows you're not a threat.

And for God's sake, don't hit on her. Even if your alcohol addled little brain tells you it's a good idea, it isn't.

Take care everyone.

x

Posted by calima at September 5, 2005 11:38 AM