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August 31, 2004

Nearly here

Today and tomorrow are my 1 year anniversary of being here in Glasgow. (yes, mog, you were right (as were you luminati)).

Why two days? That's how long it took me. Well..not really 'how long', but I left the states on teh 31st and got here on the 1st.

Funny that I'm remembering things that I once thought were 'quaint' and things I never thought I'd get used to.

Thank you, Glasgow, it's been a lovely year. I hope there are more to come.

Happy anniversary to me.

Posted by calima at 05:56 PM | Comments (2)

oh take a guess

Guess what today is?

x

Posted by calima at 12:22 PM | Comments (2)

I'm not greedy. Oh no I'm not.

Last night was a night of freaks, big hair, flamers and the nouveau riche. Yes, I volunteered for a shift at the theatre; the shift being one of a private hire.

I could positively kick myself for that. I heard about a possible shift, and I got dollar signs in my eyes and...well, let's just let this be a lesson that greed will get you nowhere.

The gig was a hair/fashion show, which I thought 'Oh cool'. I should have bolted off in the other direction when I learned that not only had the models set off the fire alarm with the amount of hairspray they were using, but also that they refused to go to the restaurant to pick up the dinners they ordered, stating stiffly that, 'We were told that someone would bring it up to us.'

I thought models didn't eat.

At any rate, there was a champagne reception at the start, overwhich I looked with envy. You can imagine that with such a reception that the place would be packed. Well...it was. I think that, had the fire brigade stopped by on the off-chance of catching us cramming too many people into a small space, that they would have caught us cramming too many people into a small space.

Due to the champagne, we had to take tickets at the foyer door. This makes it extremely hard to police people, as they'll just come and go out of whatever door they choose. And I was the ticket nazi. No ticket, no entry. You're on the guest list? Oh. Looks like you're not. Go away.

A crowd of people swarmed around me, trying to get in, and I told them in my very stern voice, 'Look, please have your tickets ready, or I'm not opening the door.' It's always mildly amusing when you have to address a group of adults as though they are children. And they complied. Ha.

One woman, who had positioned herself in the midst of a family of four, tried to sneak past me. She looked like someone's grandmother, someone's friend. She didn't look exactly out of place, is my point.

Me: Excuse me, do you have your ticket?
Her: Can I buy a ticket?
me:No, sorry, we're sold out
her: But I want to get in.
me:of course you do, but I'm sorry, i can't let you in without a ticket
her: But it looks so lovely.
me: (looking longingly at the overflowing free champagne) yes, it does look lovely, but if you don't have a ticket, then you can't come inside.

At this point, the woman's eyes fill up with tears as she looks around at the beautiful people around us who are lightly sipping champagne from long stemmed glasses, delicately smoking cigarettes and chatting idly. She begins to harrass people around her, trying to get a ticket from someone.

Now I realize that this woman is going to be a problem. So I'm on the walkie talkie to my mgr:

me: Red Leader do you have a copy?
RL: Roger Roger
me: I need security here as I have an A-14 in progress. Repeat, I have an A-14 in progress!

(Ok...right, it doesn't go like that. We don't have a code and there's no such thing as an A-14 (and no conceivable way that an A-14 could be 'in progress'.)

No, the conversation went more like:

Me: Get over here now
him: Coming.

The woman put up a fight with the manager also, which was sad. She tried big tears, she tried getting angry, she tried sneaking off into the crowd (yeah, we're not that dumb), and in the end we had to escort her to the street and call the police. Apparently she does this sort of thing all the time, and a part of me wants to feel sorry for her. She probably lives alone and just wants to be included and make friends. I'm sure that had I taken her bribe (oh, did I mention she offered me £15 to let her in?), she would have been much more well-behaved than the others that actually had tickets.

We were filled to absolute capacity and then some. We had about 7 people who had to be turned away. These people were on the guest list, but the rule is: ticket-holders get seated first and then non-ticket-holders get any leftover seats. This seems to be reverse logic, as you'd think that people who were important enough to be on the guest list would get in first.

Well, we didn't organize it, some other dolt did, therefore mothers, brothers, friends and boyfriends of models in the show were turned away. It's sad really.

But if that weren't bad enough, the current crowd was rowdy. I've dealt with rowdy before, but never like this. They had a complete disregard for:

I swear it was like babysitting. I have never known such a bratty group of people in all my nearly-one-year at the theatre.

This put me in a very bad mood. Especially when some prick (and believe me, I don't use that word often (if at all) so he really deserved it) decided to get snippy with me about his drink. Let me also point out that he was a model in the show. Whether or not that had any bearing on his attitude, I can't say. I just put the facts out there and let you decide if he was a model becuase he was a prick, or if he was a prick becuase he was a model. Or if he was one of those really lucky types that just happens to be both a model and a prick.

At any rate, I was nearly racing out of the theatre at the end of my shift. I raced away, cursing under my breath and raced right into the arms of Sweetheart and a lovely carbonara that he'd made for me.

And I will never, ever allow the words, 'Calima, do you want to make a little extra money for a shift this week?' sway my normally impeccable intuition of 'Why doesn't anyone else want this shift? what's wrong with it?' again.

Becuase I am feeling a bit at an angle today (after all that...imagine) I will move my desk.

Posted by calima at 10:54 AM | Comments (0)

August 30, 2004

Beautiful

Earth View

Posted by calima at 04:26 PM | Comments (0)

can never make up my mind

I changed my look again. I liked the parchment so much that I stole it ;)

Not sure if comments are working correctly. If you guys could test that out for me, that'd be fab!

ta!

(p.s. thank you to Movable Style for the cool parchment!)

x

Posted by calima at 02:51 PM | Comments (1)

It's monday isn't it?

This morning, I got up an hour before I needed to. This was not on purpose.

I didn't set the alarm last night. I knew I didn't, which is ok. I figured I'd get up. I was too right. I thought the clock said 830, so I got up. It was really 730am.

This is why I prefer digital.

Anyhow, when I got out of the shower, sweetheart informed me that I had plenty of time and I realized I had gotten up too early. I'm so disappointed. I went back to bed.

However, now my hair's all funny becuase I slept on it when it was wet. You know what? It was worth it for that extra hour of sleep.

Tomorrow is my year anniversary of being in Glasgow. Actually it's Anniversary Part 1, as I didn't actually arrive in Glasgow until the 1st, though my plane took off on the 31st.

Anyhow, tonight sweetheart is making me a lovely supper of I-don't-know-what-yet. I can't wait. I missed him all weekend becuase I was off at the...

MOST DISAPPOINTING LECTURE EVER

Ok...well...actually there was no lecture, so it wasn't all that disappointing, technically. Regan and I ran our poor wee hearts out to get to the lecture on time in order to see my favourite author, Janice Galloway.

We turned up about 5 minutes late, were told we could still get in (yay), only to arrive at the front door and learn from the usher there that Ms Galloway had cancelled due to illness.

Regan and I had no choice but to pout for the rest of the day.

The weekend was somewhat saved by (aside from fajitas for dinner) our attending a lecture by Toni Morrison at a lecture for Amnesty International.

I thought it was a great lecture. Though I mused to myself about how 'academic' it was of me to attend a lecture that wasn't mandatory for University credit. Ha.

And that's the answers to the quiz from earlier. Hope you've enjoyed playing!

x

Posted by calima at 12:03 PM | Comments (0)

What happened on Friday

BBC NEWS | Scotland | Police name dead river rescue man

Posted by calima at 11:13 AM | Comments (0)

August 27, 2004

In Glasgow pt2

(Mom, if you're reading this, don't read this)

I hereby designate this day 'Mental Day'.

About 30 minutes ago, I saw out of my office window, a helicopter hovering over the river. Right about the time I was going to say, 'What is all that racket?' my co-worker looked out and saw all sorts of police, and then the ambulance, sirens full tilt came barrelling in.

We thought at first that someone had jumped off the bridge. I would reckon that's not uncommon, as there are many bridges and the nice cold Clyde to break one's fall into attempted suicide.

Upon further 'investigation', my co-worker has determined that someone was probably 'offed' under the bridge about a half a block away from my office.

We watched as police scattered around the area and yet another ambulance showed up, sirens again, blazing loudly.

I wondered aloud if it was the mental woman we saw earlier. CW laughed.

It's not very funny at all, actually.

We saw a body being packed into the ambulance, and when the ambulance didn't immediately burn rubber and start screeching away at mach 4, we determined that the vicitm is most likely no longer living.

The day has slowly (or quickly) descended into The Mental, which does not bode well for the rest of my evening, as I have plans to go to Edinburgh tonight for fun-filled festival action.

I attribute today's weirdness to the fact that I've been reading recaps of Six Feet Under all day. The Mental has arrived.

It must be August in Glasgow.

Posted by calima at 04:45 PM | Comments (0)

In Glasgow...

My co-worker and I just saw a woman go mental on the street outside. We stood and watched as a woman, late 20's, sat cross-legged on the sidewalk, with her somerfield bag, sobbing. Two policemen stood over her, talking in soothing voices to her. But still she sobbed, she uttered words inaudible to me.

One policement tried to help her up, but she freaked a little more, screamed and jerked her arm away from him.

The policement were patient for a little while longer and then tried 'tough love'. They yelled at her to get up, they used strong voices, but she just freaked out a bit more.

In the end, they called an ambulance for her. At this moment, as my co-worker and I listen out the open window, we hear the ambulance workers and possibly the policemen too, yelling at her, trying to force her cooperate.

My co-worker believes she's just drunk (and it's only noon!), and they'll prolly take her to hospital and stick her on a drip.

It gets me thinking about the ways people try to get attention, even if it isn't necessarily positive attention. Chin up, lady I wanted to say, Pull yourself together, go home and sleep it off.

Sometimes a good cry is just what you need...but not necessarily on the sidewalk on a busy city street. I'd like to feel sorry for her, but somehow I can't.


Posted by calima at 12:08 PM | Comments (0)

August 26, 2004

just because

Becuase boredom is my middle name here at work today, I thought I'd Google.

Google sounds like a ritualistic tribal dance, doesn't it?

Well.

so, I went to Google typed in 'wanker' and becuase I'm bored, I clicked, 'I'm feeling lucky'.

Now, all sorts of thoughts went through my head about what terrible pr0n site I was going to encounter, but I was pleasantly surprised to find a very biting, sarcastic instructional page on How to write like a wanker.

This, coincidentally, goes along with the apparent theme for this week which is, 'Let's take the piss out of Calima for not spelling 'because' correctly....ever.'

Please note that it's spelled correctly in the title, and that's just a sheer accident. Really. I didn't mean to type it like that.


This entry brought to you by the letter W.

Posted by calima at 04:59 PM | Comments (3)

Two entries today

Just so that you can play Morgan's game of 'Let's try to guess which author Calima is seeing this weekend'

I'm actually seeing two.

I will tell you if you're right or wrong.

I will not give you any more hints. You've had too many already.

Ok? Ready? Set? Go.

Posted by calima at 11:13 AM | Comments (5)

Entry rated R for use of strong language

I didn't make my eggdrop soup.

But, despite my lazy actions, I still haven't got 'it' yet. I don't feel it lurking around quite as heavily today, and I'm hoping that the threat of eggdrop soup scared it away.

Yeah, that's what I thought, bitch.

*ahem*

I'm feeling rather 'curse-ish' today. I'm not quite sure why. Just like in the 5th grade when I discovered that my mom would never know if I cursed when I was out with my friends. I think I was the bad-mouthed sailor of the group. I remember that my favourite phrase was 'No shit, Sherlock'.

I was so clever. *snort-hee-snort-hee-snort*

Lately, I haven't been cursing nearly as much as I did before I got to Glasgow. That is, of course, other than saying 'fucking' every other word. It's so natural now...it's like ending all my sentances with 'you know' (which I annoyingly say all the time).

Among my favourite curse phrases of all time are:

I love saying jackass. I don't know why but it's the most satisfying one to say. 'Jackass'. Love it. Makes me smile.

I've never understood why curse words are bad. I don't think they are. Any word (in theory) can be used offensively. Ok, maybe not the word 'the'. But it doesn't take a curse word to offend, is my point. I can say something just as cutting and not curse. So why are curse words bad?

I found this article about Gordon Ramsey that I thought was interesting. They're not concerned that he necessarily cursed on air. They're just concerned about his using two curse words together.

So, he blashemied (said 'Jesus') in conjunction with a curse word, and somehow that's worse than just cursing outright.

I'm reading the article yesterday and I'm not concerned that he cursed, or that he blasphemied (this is Gordon Ramsey we're talking about here), nor am I the least bit surprised. All I really wondered, while reading the article was, 'I wonder what he said?'

I mean...if there's a new curse phrase sweeping the nation, I wanna know what it is before it goes out of style. Have to keep up on these things, ya know?

Posted by calima at 11:09 AM | Comments (3)

August 25, 2004

hmna

I can feel it coming. 'It' made itself known last night. I wondered why my neck was hurting and stiff. In my head was a dull ache. A few sneezes here and there.

Ooooh Nooooew.

So, I'm feeling very achey, very tired (very tired). Tonight I shall have to make some eggdrop soup to battle 'it', as I have major plans this weekend and I will not (repeat: will not) let 'it' ruin my time.

I am seeing one of my favourite authors on Saturday. I'm so excited. I would compare it to meeting a hero. I can't wait, it's going to be fabulous.

Unless 'it' has taken over. In which case I'll be a very pissed off puppy./

Mmmmeggdropsoouuuuppmmmm

x

Posted by calima at 11:33 AM | Comments (5)

August 23, 2004

Graffiti

There is graffiti everywhere in Glasgow. It seems like a blank wall is just too tempting for some to pass by without making their mark. It leads me to wonder about Graffiti. Is it some way for people to leave their mark, and imprint, an 'I was here, I exist'? Is it a place to advertise their favourite pub, favourite band, or the number of some guy that dumped them? Is it a place to practice penmanship? (I've seen a lot of the same letters 'practised' over and over again, always curly, always trying to be impressive' Did they practice on that wall so it would look perfect on another wall somewhere else?)

Sometimes it just seems like an excuse to write a naughty word over and over again, in the hopes of, I dunno, embarassing the people who see it. Everyone knows about the F-word. Is it possible that someone's going to look at it and say, 'Fuck. Hmm...I wonder what that means?'

Or is 'Fuck' written on the wall because the author had just been spotted by the police or the shop owner and 'Fuck!' was the last thing running through their mind before they started running through the alley to get away?

Or 'I'm forced to write on this wall. Fuck.'

Some graffiti is pretty...pretty shapes, pretty colours, little drawings of people or places. Or perhaps pearls of wisdom: 'We don't want your bloody war.' or 'Arms are for embracing, not killing'.

Can graffiti, even the vulgar ones, be art?

And even more importantly, is my little space here at heavenly-creatures.net, this blog, these pages of nothing but me...is this my version of graffiti? Are we bloggers simply making a mark of our own on the internet? (I nearly said, 'Information superhighway' there...aren't you glad I didn't?)

Is this Graffiti?

Fuck.

Posted by calima at 10:44 AM | Comments (5)

August 19, 2004

Smart Bear

CNN.com - Bear guzzles 36 beers, passes out at campground - Aug 18, 2004

EATTLE, Washington (Reuters) -- A black bear was found passed out at a campground in Washington state recently after guzzling down three dozen cans of a local beer, a campground worker said on Wednesday.

...

It turns out the bear was a bit of a beer sophisticate. He tried a mass-market Busch beer, but switched to Rainier Beer, a local ale, and stuck with it for his drinking binge.

Posted by calima at 01:02 PM | Comments (2)

August 18, 2004

you might not care...

...but I just created my very first database!

Hurrah!

Yep..I'm feeling pretty good about myself at this moment...I'm sure I'll be all glum and blue when it falls apart in my hands, but for the moment, I'm pretty proud of myself.

Ha!

Ha Access! I beat you! I BEAT YOU!!!

ahem...I stop now.

Posted by calima at 03:41 PM | Comments (0)

change of plans

So, I was looking through Google Image Search this morning, looking for a picture to illustrate the kitty dream I had last night.

I didn't find what I wanted, and gave up quite quickly, simply becuase I saw a couple of pics that made me laugh so hard, I decided to put this entry up instead of my original.

Hope they make you smile too!

sleepy kitty

Pissed off kitty

Posted by calima at 10:25 AM | Comments (3)

August 17, 2004

Opinion Poll

Is 'witty' the same as 'funny'?

Posted by calima at 10:26 AM | Comments (6)

August 16, 2004

button yer beak

Have you ever yelled at nature? I mean, really, yelled.

Did you actually expect something to happen?

Why would I yell at nature? you ask.

Well, that's a good question. Here's an example:

Saturday night, I had a terrible time sleeping. I was exhausted, but it was hot, and then the seagulls outside my window decided they were going to have a barbeque and invite all their friends over.

If you've ever heard gulls before, they sound like they're screaming and laughing.

I had the intense urge, though I love nature, to open my window wide and tell those hoodlums to button their beaks and give me some peace and quiet.

But I know that seagulls don't care. They'd just keep on. So I had to put my pillow over my head and coax myself back to sleep, only to be woken up over and over again with their calls. It was either that, or shut my window and suffocate from heat.

I suppose it's going to be something I have to get used to: gulls. I've lived in a high traffic area with sirens going off, and eventually coped. I've even lived next to a train station and adjusted to the sounds of trains going by whistling at 3am. Can I adjust to gulls? I swear they sound like someone's plucking their feathers out one by one with the racket they make.

At any rate...

Reasons to be happy today (in no particular order):


  1. It's not raining
  2. I look cute today
  3. I have my cuppa and a biscuit
  4. I have a job I love
  5. I have my sweetheart I love
  6. I have curry in the fridge waiting to be eaten
  7. My shower works
  8. MSN Minesweeper Flags
  9. It's nearly lunchtime.

x

Posted by calima at 11:58 AM | Comments (0)

August 13, 2004

spoilt

So, I've been spoiled the past week or so. Sweetheart has done nothing but cook and clean and do laundry. I haven't had to lift a finger

I'm not sure what I did to deserve such glorious treatment, but I like it!

He made a lovely chili on Tuesday, which was perfect for the weather we were having (hard rain). And it sustained us for Wednesday evening as well. And if you know anything about chili, it's always just as good, if not better, the second day.

Delish.

So, tonight I'm preparing my famous chicken and roasted potatoes for him. If any of you remember from my old blog ages ago, I have a special clay roasting dish that steams the food slowly. Sweetheart hasn't tried it since I brought the dish back from the US with me, so I'm excited for him to taste what it can do.

I don't think, however, that this one meal is in any way proportionate response to the spoiling he's done all week. I shall have to come up with other things to do to get him back.

Posted by calima at 03:34 PM | Comments (4)

burst

Poet Ted Kooser, described as a "major voice" of American poetry, has been made the new US poet laureate.
"Ted Kooser is a major poetic voice for rural and small town America and the first poet laureate chosen from the Great Plains," Mr Billington said.
Kooser, 65 from Lincoln, Nebraska replaces Pulitzer Prize winner Louise Gluck in the eight-month role.
...

I'm very excited about this ;)

Posted by calima at 10:48 AM | Comments (0)

August 12, 2004

What's 'sovereign' mean?

If you don't know, you're best off looking it up in the dictionary.

Just don't ask Bush

Posted by calima at 02:53 PM | Comments (1)

Elfman

For the past couple of weeks, I have been slobbering over a CD that I want. Now, before I name the cd, let me just let you all know that I realize I'm a freak for being such a freak about movie scores. I love movie scores. I would buy a score over my favourite band's new album.

Why do I love scores so much? Well, I think it has a lot to do with the emotion that I felt when watching the movie the first time. I believe that the perfect movie score is one that compliments the film, rather than detracting from it, or going unnoticed altogether. It should not distract your attention from the scene, it should compliment it...your heart races during a chase scene, or fills to bursting with emotion during the crucial confession of adoration.

So, when I hear a movie score again, I get those same feelings all over again. Not to mention that good music alone can invoke those feelings without the 'backdrop' of a movie.

I believe that most people feel the way I do, whether they realize it or not. You'll notice that during human interest stories on Dateline or 20/20, that a familiar film score will be used. Why? Becuase of the emotion it invokes.

Now...back to my freakishness. For the past 2 or so weeks, I have been agitated to the point of near-crying becuase of my 'need' to have the Spider-Man score.

And here's where I continue my freakishness when I tell you that I believe that Danny Elfman is one of the best film score composers ever. I could go down the list of all the film scores he's composed and yes, I have nearly all of them.

There are obviously other great composers out there...John Williams (Star Wars, Harry Potter), James Horner (Titanic, Apollo 13), Thomas Newman (American Beauty, The Shawshank Redemption). I admit, I love all of them.

But with the exception of Thomas Newman, there's only one composer whose score I would buy without ever hearing it before: and that's Danny Elfman.

So, yesterday, when I was presented with a 'gift' of the Spider-man score, I nearly burst into tears.

Am I obsessed? Possibly. Do I need psychological attention? No...just give me my score, my ipod and a comfortable chair and I'll be fine.

Now, I want the Spider-Man2 score.

*coughfreakcough*

Posted by calima at 11:32 AM | Comments (3)

August 11, 2004

crave

I want Cheetos.

I huge bag of faux cheesy snacky goodness.

I miss cheetos. Why doesn't frito lay distribute here?

*whine*


My boss is having lunch delivered. I couldn't be happier. Except that it's already been delivered and we can't eat until she gets back from her meeting.

I believe this might be a psychology experiment to see how much drool we'll later have to clean up off of our keyboards.

As long as I get to eat that food, they can run whatever test on me they want.

Posted by calima at 12:50 PM | Comments (7)

tsk tsk...

Buffy is bad for you?!

You're damn right it wasn't indecent.

Idiots.


Posted by calima at 11:07 AM | Comments (1)

August 10, 2004

superstitious

It is raining buckets and buckets outside.

I thanked my stars again today that whoever made my umbrella made it so sturdy (I bet i've just cursed it). I've had it for nearly 2 years and though it's been blown inside out more than a few times, it's never come completely unhinged.

Plus it's cute.

My co-worker had her umbrella opened and lying on the floor of her office. I gasped and said, 'You're not supposed to open your umbrella inside!'

to which she replied, 'You can, as long as you don't put it over your head.'

Oh?

'Yeah,' she said, 'it brings rain if you do that'

Ok...so what about the shoes on the table?

'That only works if they're new. If they're old you can put them wherever you want'.

I had no idea there were so many rules for superstitions.

So, I sit here, and my umbrella sits in the room next door, completely opened to allow it to dry. I certainly hope her rule is true. Watch me walk out the door and break my leg.

Or watch me break my leg just becuase I just said, 'Watch me walk out the door and break my leg'.

Such a tricky business. You can't say anything nowadays.

Posted by calima at 05:25 PM | Comments (2)

ljcrosspost

Well...b implimented the LJ Cross post stuff, but it apparently doesn't like extended entries. So, we're going to have to hold off on giving everyone lj cross posting access until that's sorted.

Thanks for the hugs yesterday. Also, my knee is doing much better today, thanks to the over-the-counter-availability of codeine/paracetamol mixed tablets.

Bless.

I also learned how to make a cup of tea, which also vastly improved my day.

x

Posted by calima at 10:37 AM | Comments (0)

August 09, 2004

misery

I had a very miserable night last night, which resulted in a miserable injury, and a miserable walk in the rain, which has all resulted in me being in a very 'fuck off' mood for today.

Also, here's a wee lesson in gratitude: If someone does something for you, out of the goodness of his or her wee beating heart, it would not kill you to say 'Thank you'. You dont have to send a bouquet of flowers, just the words will do. Trust me, people will appreciate it more than you know.

Posted by calima at 10:42 AM | Comments (4)

August 05, 2004

heh yep

My boss is from New York. We had a spectacularly long chat today about foods we miss.

And then:

her: I wish they had Fritos here
me: Oh me too!
her:And you know what I really miss? I mean really really miss?
me: (thinks of how much me misses Taco Bell)
herTaco Bell. I fucking love that place!
me: *falls off chair*

Yeah...I'd say we have a lot in common. She said she tried to buy a taco bell franchise to open here in the Uk, but that taco bell corp wouldn't have it. She said she's tried negotiating with them, but they're not budging.

So, instead, she's going to open up a taco bell rip-off.

I'm so chuffed.


Posted by calima at 06:11 PM | Comments (7)

August 04, 2004

oh just smile for crying out loud

I have just opened my bag from BK, inside which is my whopper value meal.

Yeah. My fries are all over the bag.

I don't know who decided that fries will stay in the little paper thing, but they were sooooo wrong.

I'm not mad about it though. It actually brought up a weird childhood memory for me. As a child, I always loved eating the fries that fell into the bag. For some reason, they always tasted better.


Things that made me smile today:

1. My boss, laughing uncontrollably with her head on her desk, as I told her 'The smelly' story from my run-in at social seccurity this morning (See the 'More' section for details.

2. The two ladies on the street who stopped abruptly, stared at the man that walked past them. One said, 'Hey, I broke up with him!'

3. A cool looking tote bag for only £8

4. The 30 second bunnies site

5. Fox Trot


So, I'm in social security hell headquarters this morning. It was your basic nightmare:

So, I get there, and I'm thinking, 'Oh cool. I have an appointment! I dont' have to wait in the waiting area hell!'

heh.

Wrong, calima. You're sooo wrong.

They said, 'Oh, I see you have an appointment. Ok, well, then, why dont' you just go over there and sit with the 30 people that were here before you, until we call your number.'

*cries*

I sat in the back, wishing that I hadn't forgotten my bloody book at home, and I smell this smell. Considering that a man just sat down next to me, I drew the obvious conclusion that it was something he was wearing or exerting and tried to ignore it.

Then I realized that it wasn't coming from him and then, had to set out to find the source of the smell. Why? I don't know. But it just makes me feel better, I guess knowing that the smell isn't coming from me.

So, I'm sniffing around, and finally discover that the guy in front of me has taken off his shoe and is sort of playing around and pushing it around with his black socked toes.

Ewwww.

I contemplated how rude it would be if I leaned up, tapped him on the shoulder and said, 'Excuse me. Could you please put your foot back in your shoe? We're trying to inhale clean oxygen back here.'

Instead, I popped a piece of very strong mint gum, which pretty much knocked out my smelling capacity.

So, I waited for about 20 minutes before I was called (turns out that having an appointment did in fact bump me up the queue a bit).

I have my interview, and it's nerve-wracking.

There is no reason on earth it should be nerve-wracking. They're not briefing me for corporate espionage or quizzing me on the history of Man or times tables or anything. They're just asking me about me and, really, that's one thing on which I should be an expert.

But it still feels like a police interrogation.

Interviewer: What nationality are you?!
Me: I'm umm....I'm ummmmmmmmmm....No, wait, I know this....I'm an Amer-i-can.
Interviewer eyes me keenly and scribbles furiously on application
Interviewer (points to door): That's WRONG! GET OUT! OUT!!

At any rate, I passed the test of 'ME' and got my application sent in for my NI number, but I came out feeling like all the life and happiness had been sucked out of my body.

Until I came into work and had a rousing re-telling of the tale with my co-workers.

hee!

Posted by calima at 01:54 PM | Comments (4)

The funniest thing...

You have to watch
30 second Bunnies Theatre.

I watched Alien (my fave, I think) and nearly peed on myself...

x

Posted by calima at 01:12 PM | Comments (3)

August 03, 2004

sleeeeeeeep

I have insomnia. Ta da!

If you've ever battled with sleep before, you will know exactly how frustrating it is to be insomniatic. I'm not sure why I can't sleep, I'm perfectly tired enough, but I'm not tired.

It's really pissing me off. I want to sleep. I want to sleep soundly. And I want it now.

A quick announcement for you h-c.netters...if you fancy a new look for your blog, let me know. I have some new templates available.

x

Posted by calima at 11:03 AM | Comments (0)

August 02, 2004

What a lovely idea

This is where you'll one day find my collection.

I'll be listed in the 'unfinished' section...

x

Posted by calima at 11:40 AM | Comments (1)

too funn

I just had to post this...I can't stop snickering...

From Neil Gaiman

"I was amused to read in the Guardian about this parody site, and equally as amused to read the UK government order to take it down: This is a very is [sic] serious campaign that should not be trivialised. In the interests of helping people to cope in the event of a crisis or a disaster we would ask that you to take down the site, immediately, and not put it up again in another guise, says the person from the non-parodic government version of the site, convinced that maybe people will believe that there really is a "Department of Vague Paranoia", and that they really are being advised about what to do in case of zombie attack."

Posted by calima at 12:34 AM | Comments (1)

August 01, 2004

grody

When I was a kid, I used to say 'grody' all the time. I meant 'gross', but 'grody' is such a great word.

So...question: What do you call something that's full of puss?

...

Yeah, I thought it ended up being a naughty word. I won't write it here.

Anyhow...the burn on my arm is much worse than I orginally thought. It started blistering the day after, and then, becuase it's my the arm I use to mouse with, I ended up *scraaaaaaape* up the desk.

Yowsa.

Anyhow, now my burn is all [insert word that means oozing with puss here] and grody. It's sick just looking at it. I've been putting a ton of neosporin on it, but I think it's still going to be a big ugly scar. Which annoys me becuase my arms are pretty scar-less unlike my legs, which have gone through the punishment of my tomboy 'let's play evil knieval on our bikes' stage.

*sigh*

Grody.

Posted by calima at 08:00 PM | Comments (3)