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July 29, 2005

Fare thee well


Poor Beastie hasn't been set up in over a year, which means that all of my favourites and bookmarks are all outdated.

I spent a bit of time today going through all my favourites and found some old blogs that I had completely forgotten about.

Sadly, some of my old favourite bloggers have abandoned their blogs and moved on. I find it very sad, as I've been reading about their lives, reading their humour, about their adventures for so long, that I felt as though I knew them. To visit their sites now and see only a blank page, a 'page not found' or some lengthy goodbye post just makes me sad; and I wonder if I'll ever get to read their blogs again.

But this, you see, is the illusion. You don't know me, and if I read your blog, it doesn't mean I know you. More and more people begin blogging and journalling every day. We can read about their lives, it's a sense of voyeurism, like sneaking into your sister's room while she's gone and reading her secret personal diary.

I'm not saying that what people blog about isn't true, but we're subconsciously selective about what we show the world here. I know, there's people out there that proclaim to say exactly what's on their mind and don't hold back, but does that mean that you can actually know that person? For, someone who gets on their journal and say any nasty, or embarassing thing they feel, doesn't necessarily mean that they're not hiding something, it just means that they're more subtle about it.

Take a look at the blogs around you...take mine for example: I don't post when I'm upset. If I am upset, I post something that's funny. I try not to whine if I can help it, and every once in a while I post about something that's pissed me off.

But mainly, you see the middle spectrum of Calima. I never let you know too much, but in that, I let you know a lot.

There's a blog I read, written by someone I know in real life, and I have to say that s/he's one of these, 'write anything I want' types. But what I've noticed from reading the entries is that s/he doesn't include the aspects of them that makes them my friend. Yeah, sure, they go off on tiny things, and curse, and bitch and don't hold back, but what you don't see in the blog is the part of them that's sweet and kind and caring.

So if you're not holding back the bad, does that mean that you hold back the good?

I really have come to the decision that no one on blogs or journals ever really reveals themselves completely. Is it becuase we want to have some mystery still? That we want someone out there to try to figure us out? Are we trying to make our voice heard in the vaccuum of the internet, amongst the millions out there, and make ourselves known as being different or special?

Agree or disagree, it doesn't make any difference to me. I don't fully believe that I could ever really know someone well enough just by reading their blog. But, in saying that, I will still miss the witty and insightful posts of Stacey George and John Conners (who was the very first soul to link my journal to his...thank you).

I'll miss you two.

x

Posted by calima at 12:48 PM | Comments (7)

July 27, 2005

strange


Today I saw a girl get into one of those grocer's cages that they use to transport lots of boxed goods from the truck to the store.

I had the strangest urge to push her down the sidewalk in it.

I think I need to indulge my inner-child soon.

Posted by calima at 02:54 PM | Comments (3)

July 25, 2005

We are the music makers. We are the dreamer of dreams

It is not nice outside. It's not bad, but just not nice. I had planned on going to the park today to write and read, but the thought of sitting on soggy grass with no sun in sight kinda put me off a bit.

I'm constantly grateful that the internet has appeared at the flat here. I know I keep saying it, but you have no idea how hard it is to go a whole year (yes, one whole year) without having it at beck and call.

My computer set up, however, really sucks. Really really. Becuase Frodo and I are sharing the internet connection, the router has to be plugged into both pc's at the same time. Due to the fact that we weren't provided with very long cords, (and the fact that our flat is ginormous), I can't stretch my cord from the router to the table.

So I'm doing the bohemian thing again, sitting on the floor with a bunch of pillows all around. It's doing horrible things to my posture and my knees, and I'm just not happy with it. Happy will be the day when I either get a longer cord, or wireless.

Met up with 4/5's of The Set yesterday, which was nice. Interestingly enough, we were all quite hungover, and though none of us could speak properly, we all seemed to understand each other perfectly. But to the non-hungover outsider, we might as well have been talking gibberish.

I will note that while we could all understand half-sentenced warblings from each other, Regan tried to speak telepathically. This did not work at all.

Was up until 530 last night, unable to sleep and going over stories in my head. I've been comissioned to write a play for next year's Fringe Festival, and though I'm excited about it, I'm also a bit nervous. This will be the first time I will have submitted anything for any sort of production. However, I actually can't wait to get started on it. It's as though writing this will be the final piece to the puzzle, whereupon I can say with confidence, 'Yes. I am a writer'

Haven't eaten all day, and am considering some popcorn. Am skint this week, so I cant' buy any groceries, and thus have to leave that burden on my capable flatmates. Frodo's quite good about buying pizza and letting me have a few slices. Bless.

Now I want pizza. Dammit.

x

Posted by calima at 03:53 PM | Comments (1)

July 24, 2005

No theiving!

I have just lost my entire entry due to IE deciding it was just going to randomly shut down.

Of course, by entire entry, I mean all 3 lines of what I had written so far.

Now that the internet is back, I've been doing a lot more web design like I used to. I fixed up Mog's blog the other day, and I'm currently trying to set a design for Frodo's theatre company, Rhymes With Purple. (As you can see at the moment, it's just a plain jane, but we needed to get info up there without having to wait for the new site).

I admit, that though I love doing all of this technical crap, I'm not the most patient person in the world. For instance,

Somehow, I still manage to think this is fun. I guess it's the end product that is the reward. I like visiting the new site 100 times an hour and saying, 'I made this!'.

So, I'm thinking of changing the look of this blog here, and I'm batting around the idea of a theme. I have no idea what theme to use though, and I saw another blog with an absolutely awesome theme and I'm vaguely considering stealing the idea. I'm not quite keen on stealing other people's ideas, and most likely will brainstorm to come up with a theme that's as clever and fresh, if not more.

Off to meet Colinopolous and Regan for tea today.

I've started up an MSN Messenger account, in case anyone would like to try to have a chat. Add me to your messenger list...calima at gmail dot com is my contact name.

Oh. And my new favourite song that I just can't get enough of is 'Mad World' from the Donnie Darko soundtrack.

x

Posted by calima at 12:41 PM | Comments (2)

July 20, 2005

i ask for coke, you give me dr pepper


I had a fight with the coke machine at work today. We've gotten into some verbal altercations in the past, but this was the last straw.

My colleague at work tonight, asked me to go up to the 5th floor and get her a diet coke; she handed me some change and said, 'And one for yourself...'

Life Lesson: When someone offers you a drink/fag/money/food, you take it.

So, I trotted up the stairs, and put some money in the machine, asked it for a diet coke, turned around to get a tea from the coffee machine, looked back and the machine was staring at me, mouth agape, saying, 'eh?'

'Diet coke' I told it again, and hit the button a bit harder to punctuate my point.

Machine took exception to my abuse, and promptly chucked out a full-fat coke, just to spite me.

'Well,' said I, ' I was going to get a full-fat coke for myself, so you just saved me a step. nanny nanny boo boo.'

Machine, however, wasn't done yet, and I really should learn to keep my mouth shut.

For, I put in more money for the diet coke, and Machine ate my 20p. I had to borrow 20p from someone else to make up for it, but Machine, that sneaky little devil, took my 20p in such a way as to prevent it from taking any more money. Each time I tried to put a coin in, it was promptly returned to me.

That's when Machine and I had 'words'; and not the kind of words you speak, if you know what I mean.

In the end, I'm sad to say that Machine won. But this was only becuase I knew I would be on CCTV, or some prank tv show or something.

'Watch with us, as this normally calm American gets indignant with a harmless Coke machine. When Good Immigrants Go Bad tonight at 9pm on Five.'

Anyhow...I got a full-fat coke out of it. My colleague, however, remained parched. In the end, Machine only won out over her, not me.

Ha, Machine.

Ha.

x

Posted by calima at 01:49 AM | Comments (5)

July 19, 2005

It's here it's here!


The internet has found its way to our flat! Woo!

'I find I can hardly sit still or keep a thought in my head'

So, the internet was supposed to arrive yesterday, but...bank holiday and all, we didn't get it until today.

I got home from Sweetheart's this morning and found Svenska convalescing on my bed watching buffy, with the internet parcel sitting next to her. I said, 'Ooo, are you feeling ok?' and then 'Ooo! Internet is here!'

Svenska is as excited by the internet as I am...Frodo's not home yet, so he doesn't even know it's arrived or been hooked up yet...but I'll wager he'll be excited.

So...now I can be online whenever...

So what was it you guys wanted me to fix again? Email me...

Also, I'm going to have a fresh start on the whole msn chat thinger...I think. I'll give you my sign in name in a couple days after I've thought this through a bit more

ciao!

x

Posted by calima at 03:23 PM | Comments (4)

July 11, 2005

It's all finally coming together


I'm rather annoyed at the moment, and not at anything or anyone in particular...but mainly it's the heat that's making me agitated.

Maybe not the heat so much...more like the lack of air conditioning anywhere.

In fact...lack of air conditioning in most public places doesn't really bother me. It's lack of air conditioning on the bus that bothers me.

That's it. It took me all this time and 3 paragraphs to say, in a nutshell, I'm really annoyed that buses dont' have a/c'.

I'm also really annoyed at Dell for leading be to believe that I could actually possibly afford a laptop from them, and then when I get to their website, they make me go through a labrynth of options, picking out what I'll live with and what I won't, until I finally get to the final page and find out that the laptop I thought I'd get for £379 is now £1,279.

That's soooo not cool man.

Maybe I'm just a snob. Perhaps I should lower my standards a bit.

Oy.

In good news, however, I'm getting the broadband hooked up a week from today, which will make life happy and cheerful once again, as I won't have to trek to uni to check emails, and I'll be able to chat away without wondering if that nerd next to me is reading my private conversations over my shoulder.

My goal for today's entry, is to apparently write everything in run-on sentances, which I don't think will be too terribly hard considering that I've had no journal writing as of late and most of my inner monologue is in run-on sentances anyway.

Harry Potter's birthday is on the 31st of this month and becuase we've been good enough to give good o'le Harry lodging in our Cupboard under the Stairs, we've decided to throw him a nice party, including fairy cakes. We may have it in the park. Should be fun!

Drokka and rb are gone now, and I must say, I had to bite back some forceful tears before they left. It's just weird thinking that they're no longer in the country. Last year, I had a terrible time adjusting to drokka being gone. It's just not right.


Anyhow...some long haired guy has relayed to me and Svenska that this lab is closing and we need to leave.

Next week by this time, there will be no long haired guy telling me to leave. As I will be at home. In my jammies. With my coffee.

Ha.

HA.

HA!

x

Posted by calima at 04:49 PM | Comments (7)