Drokka

I know I suck when it comes to writing in my blog. This is not just conjecture, its a fact. Having said that, I always intend to write in my blog, but here are the reasons why I never do.

- Most idea topics come to me while I’m walking to school, sometimes from school. I usually manage to have most of the entry sussed out before I get to class. Then, class happens and I forget that I wanted to write in my blog when I get home. Usually…
- When I get home from school, assuming I still have the idea, I have to sign into my work computer. I’m not keen on those folk knowing that a) I have a blog b) I write in my blog 3) That I’m not doing my work
- Computer fatigue. I get that a lot when I work. Seven straight hours of sitting there doing my work with only pee breaks is not conducive to my signing on to my own computer afterward. Compounded by the fact that I generally do my homework (read: reading) after and eat my dinner, I don’t really have a lot of time to write.
- Week ends have be GORGEOUS! Why send my time sitting at my computer when I could be out walking around or reading?

Today I decided that I’m thinking about it, so I should just write. What do I come up with? The reasons I don’t write. I don’t have a clue why people call me complex. LOL

I suppose I could note, yet again, that I will try to write more often but we all know that’s bullshit. September is coming and is usually plagued by depression (for me) not to mention I start school again. And boy will I have fucked up hours for that… The good news is, I have decided on what I’m going to do. I have been playing with the idea of changing my focus because of one professor. But after a brief epiphany I remembered that I’m a rebel at heart and since when do I let anyone stop me from doing anything! So… I’m back on track with that and no longer in a funk.

This whole, ‘making a decision thing’ is tough but I’m beginning to see how each one makes the next one easier. I should have learned not to flail around so much years ago. Only proving that the adage is wrong; an old dog can learn new tricks.

Until next time ((hugs)) to everyone!
d~

Snagged from Xinh.
What we have here is the top 106 books most often marked as “unread” by LibraryThing’s users. As in, they sit on the shelf to make you look smart or well-rounded. Bold the ones you’ve read, italicize the ones you started but didn’t finish, underline the ones you read for school, and bracket the books you own but haven’t read yet* and strike out the books you didn’t care for.

Anna Karenina
Crime and Punishment
Catch-22
One Hundred Years of Solitude
Wuthering Heights
The Silmarillion
Life of Pi : a novel
The Name of the Rose
Don Quixote
Moby Dick
Ulysses
in 2 languages
The Odyssey
Pride and Prejudice
Jane Eyre
A Tale of Two Cities
The Brothers Karamazov
Guns, Germs, and Steel
War and Peace
Vanity Fair
The Time Traveler’s Wife
The Iliad
Emma
The Blind Assassin
The Kite Runner
Mrs. Dalloway
Great Expectations
American Gods
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
Atlas Shrugged
Reading Lolita in Tehran : A Memoir in Books
Memoirs of a Geisha
Middlesex
Quicksilver
Wicked : The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West
The Canterbury Tales
The Historian : a novel
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Love in the Time of Cholera
Brave New World
The Fountainhead
Foucault’s Pendulum
Middlemarch
Frankenstein
The Count of Monte Cristo in 2 languages no less
Bought this at the week end
A Clockwork Orange
Anansi Boys
The Once and Future King
The Grapes of Wrath
1984
Angels & Demons
Inferno
The Satanic Verses
Sense and Sensibility
The Picture of Dorian Gray
Mansfield Park
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
To the Lighthouse
Tess of the D’Urbervilles
Oliver Twist
Gulliver’s Travels
Les Misérables
The Corrections
The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time
Dune
The Prince
The Sound and the Fury
Angela’s Ashes : a memoir
The God of Small Things
A People’s History of the United States : 1492-present
Cryptonomicon
Neverwhere
A Confederacy of Dunces
A Short History of Nearly Everything
Dubliners
The Unbearable Lightness of Being
BelovedSlaughterhouse-five
The Scarlet Letter I’m still scarred by having been forced to read this book
Eats, Shoots & Leaves
The Mists of Avalon
Oryx and Crake
Collapse : how societies choose to fail or succeed
Cloud Atlas
The Confusion
Lolita
Persuasion
Northanger Abbey
The Catcher in the Rye
On the Road
The Hunchback of Notre Dame
Freakonomics : a rogue economist explores the hidden side of everything
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance : an inquiry into values
The Aeneid
Watership Down
Gravity’s Rainbow
The Hobbit
In Cold Blood : a true account of a multiple murder and its consequences
White Teeth
Treasure Island
David Copperfield

I own nearly a 1000 books and not only do I not have most of these books, I’m not remotely interested in the majority of them. Although, I nearly did buy that Freakonomics one at the week end but I bought The Terror Dream instead. Maybe next time.

Now that my evenings are free from text books, journals, articles, projects and essays I have some time to watch television.

There are some dumbass adverts out there!

#1: Yoghurt ad where a woman, presumably in her own home, grabs a yoghurt from the refridgerator and doesn’t offer any to her friend who is asking her about what it is. How flippin’ rude! My mother would cuff me behind the ear if she ever heard I pulled that shit and I’m a terrible host! And must we concentrate on her exposed navel? Does the yoghurt have anything to do with her navel? I think not.

#2: Some yeast infection medicine where there are speech ‘bubbles’ with #&$(@# type symbols, and grumbling sounds to boot. Really? The yeast has evolved to the point of complaining and can cuss? *sigh*.

#3: The Pizza joint add that uses Mambo Italiano… the song.. just on principal. I should only need to know the words to one Italian song when it comes to pizza joints and its that “When the moon hits your eyes…” one. But nope…I knew this song before hand too, and now it sticks in my head like a whiny Matchbox 20 song.

I’m sure there are more. But these are the ones that annoy me the most right now.

Happy first full week of May!!!

Some of the tests are back and it turns out I didn’t run a kissing booth in my dreams. I do have a generic virus that my body has decided to combat while I sleep so I can go back to school and all those wonderful things. So, I’m just going to take it easy, and carry on as I was.

The last couple of weeks I’ve been feeling rather tired and uninspired. Yesterday I woke up and noticed a bump under my left ear by the jaw line. Now, when I first moved here in August, there’d recently been a mumps epidemic. In September there was another, where they recommended people get their shots.

*back to bed I go*
d~

Yeah, so last Thursday I went to get my chai latte.. you know, so that my fingers don’t freeze while I write my mid-term in the 9th level of hell and what happens?

Dodgy place this cafeteria.

Every Tuesday and Thursday I have my Celtic Lit class in a room that could keep an iceberg cold. I don’t drink coffee and can not justify paying $1.50 for a cup of luke warm water, so I’ve been suffering (along with others).

Last week, I finally ventured to the pay cafeteria and got myself a wrap (didn’t know this place was around either) and as I neared the till I smelt something warm and familiar… chai. I looked up at the board and it says “We serve Starbucks products here.” I nearly had heart failure.

I paid for my wrap and off I went. This past Tuesday, before classes I went and got myself a chai latte… I was in heaven, especially since, unlike the rest of the things at uni, it was cheaper than at the Starbucks back home.

I’ll never have to freeze in that class again!!!

d~

Was my first full day smoke free. Who would have ever thought I could go a whole 365 days? Surely not me.

Do I feel better? I don’t know, but I don’t cough anymore, so I guess that’s good. Am I richer? Nope… LOL

Traded one addiction in for another. *sigh*

d~

You know, I promised myelf I would write in my blog often, and I couldn’t do it. So yeah, I suck. I could blame school, that would be very easy wouldn’t it. People would just say things like ‘yeah, school is hard and takes up a lot of time’ but that would be a cop-out.

I’m lazy. That’s the long and short of it. I work, I go to school, I do school work, and then I watch films. I could put a film on hold for a bit and actually write in blog, letting people know what’s going, providing some sort of point of view of the world. Hell, I could go to my booklist blog and write review of one of the two books I read during the winter break. I didn’t even turn my computer on during the break. I watched films and read books. Actually, I read quite a lot.

Naomi Klein’s Shock Doctrine, Stephen Colbert’s book, Kevin Sites The Hot Zonea couple of romances that I’d been loaned, Tacitus’ The Histories: Germany & Agricola. I have plenty to say about most of them, but nope, not me; I kept mum on it all.

Now, I have to write an anthropological paper on “How can anthropology help us answer the question: Do Muslim women really need saving?” Why am I blogging instead? Well, it is very simple. I’ve been assigned a huge question but limited to only what one article that was assigned to us. My history class is like this too; limiting the resources to write a paper. I’m 38 years old, I believe I have a good sense of what the world has to offer, and I have a collection of books I can use as resource, I have the internet, and I have, what I think to be, a critical mind. I also have a 7 page article….that’s it!
I can’t think in a box. Never could, that’s why I didn’t go to college right out of highschool. That’s why I never intended to go to college at all. Its stifling and I’ve idea how to move within the confines.

Its an intellectual torture box.

Now I understand why adults created their own form of highschool. It wasn’t for the more flexible hours, it was so that they could see beyond the simplistic language of Of Mice and Men, or the immediate results of any pre-twentieth century revolution, and even see beyond fantastical world of faeries and gobblins in Old Irish tales (Where I’ve yet to encounter any gobblins btw). They created these places because they needed the ability to let their experiences play a part.

It took me two months to figure it out, but I realize I did extremely well on the two essays that I wrote where I was given all the latitude in the world. I didn’t have to ‘answer’ anyone’s question, I simply had to write about a ‘topic’. The papers I had to write answering an assigned question is where I fail. This simply supports what I’ve always said about my inability to sit an exam where there are essay questions. I get it now…. but how to fix it?

Who the hell knows….

d~

So I’ve managed to get through the first 1/4 of the school year without a lot of issues. I’ve been able to manage my time to ensure that there’s enough to go to school and to work, and in theory to study.

Had mid-terms… didn’t study for shit. I probably shouldn’t admit that, but it’s true. I’m only a month and a half in and I’m already back to my old highschool ways. What does this mean? Well, it meas that I suck at short answer questions, but since I’m quite skilled at bull shit, I excel at essay questions. Yes… you’re right. I am screwed when there are no essay questions (unless it’s multiple choice, but that’s a whole other bucket of beans)

The result is that I’ve decided to actually apply myself for the next term and do a comparative analysis. Why? Because I need to figure out if it’s worth stressing over the details or not. If in the end the marks aren’t any different, then all those teachers of years past were wrong. It’s not about application but rather a study in retention.

Which am I routing for? I’m routing for rentention, and not for the reasons one might think. It’s not because I’m not willing to study if I need to, it’s just that if I have to study then my film watching and leisure book reading time is at a stand still. See, it’s not enough for me to be learning the things I do in classes, but I need to keep my mind occupied in learning things I aren’t included in my classes.

See… I can’t be limited in the number of topics I’m learning. I’ve always had 1/2 dozen or more books on the go at once. They were always on different topics and somehow I could link them all. As were the films I watched. Without the time to enjoy these other options in learning I fear I may starting feeling slightly caged. I need to have something processing in my mind constantly, I can’t do that in an instituted environment.

Oh well… until I conclude the analysis, I’ll just have to cope with the bit of time I have to myself and make the most of it.

As for Xinh’s question in the previous posting.

What we’re learning in “genres and forms” is really a smattering of different places one can find the English language and it’s uses. We’ve just done the history of film from flip pictures to musicals. We won’t be doing anything beyond that I don’t think. Although, I have to say, he did want to have us view the Dead Poet’s Society, but since many students have already done this in highschool, he’s looking for an alternative.

Shame The History Boys isn’t about English…..

Cheers!
d~