Tomorrow is "the day." The campus is crawling with security, compared to normal. It's not just campus security but I've seen local police and highway patrol. (Most of which fall into the 'hot' category fortunately.)

I overheard a conversation in the cafeteria that mirrored my complaint about how I heard about this event. A kid was talking to some guy who must be administration or a teacher or something. The kid essentially said something about it being scribbles on the wall. The other dude told him that it was much more serious and the content of the message and, if I overheard correctly (which I might not have), there was artwork involved as well. The look on the kid's face was total shock. I didn't really hear the rest of it but I know the other dude told him the deal about it being okay to not go to classes tomorrow if he feels uncomfortable. I'm curious as to how many students will be around.

I forget if I mentioned this but last Thursday there was a meeting with the administration over "the day" and they talked about what they were doing to deal with it. We could write down questions and I wrote down the one I had about why I heard about the seriousness of "the day" through LJ and not from them. Mine happened to be the first one they answered. The woman who is in charge of writing press releases missed my point completely. She really thought she'd done a good job letting us all know about the "racial slur." To the point that I think my question hurt her feelings. I can only assume this is the first time she's dealt with something like this. A death threat is so much more serious than a racial slur. I can only hope this is the only time she has to deal with crap like this. Shouldn't be happening at all. Anyway, listening to the conversation between the two guys just emphasized that I'm not being picky and that I have a right to be annoyed.

I have to say I'm leaning toward nothing happened. This message was written on a Friday night ans was found around 1AM. It's highly possible that some kid got drunk. I'm a little worried only because I wonder how I'd react if I were in the middle of something. Would I keep my head on? Would I see someone else cry and become stereotypical girl? Would I get pissed off, be dumb and try to play hero? I've been in hairy situations where I'm the one who had to break up the fight or chase off the bad man who wants a piece of the female I'm with and I handled it well. That was a long time ago though and over the last few years of being in school, I don't handle stress as well as I used to. Then again, the thing about school that caused the stress is over. Maybe the old, non-psychotic me is coming back? Maybe I'd be the level headed one again?

Something else that has come up in conversations, including a very eye opening one this morning during 7AM Fit, is how badly do I want to be a law enforcement ranger? If I went through academy, it's possible that I'd have to deal with a real, live situation like "the day." Do I want to be in a job where I might have to kill someone? Or I have to go into a school to confront a shooter and have to step over dead bodies, or dying bodies clutching at my legs and begging for help? Mr. R of 7AM Fit said that he went through a training exercise around the time of Columbine (I think, or sometime after) with experienced officers and most of them didn't handle it well at all. Allegedly one guy wet himself when he came in contact with the fake-perp (played by Mr. R). Yeah, I can pull apart a fight but guns? Explosions? Hostage situations? Do I want to do that? Can I handle it? Definitely something to think about. I wasn't planning on doing academy till next winter (maybe, depending on physical condition) so I have some time to give this good consideration.

Okay, time to go. I have a test in a 1/2 hour. Later.
Amy