New Leaves

That does it. (Rant ahead)

I will have a good digital camera within six months.

There is a moonbow tonight around the full moon and it's absolutely gorgeous and I found myself wishing that I could take a picture of it so that everyone could see.

My camera, I'd have to fiddle with too much to get a decent shot of it.

I had lovely guac w/ Dusty. Who seems to have caught a muse. Imagine that.

I am mostly better except for this nagging cough that I have. And for the fact that I am still sleeping downstairs on the couch so that the cough doesn't get started.

I am slightly annoyed at my inlaws for changing the Christmas schedule around and then trying to tell me how I was going to make my plans. Um no. I said to wait, I mean it. I'll deal with it on monday when i go back to work and can find out all the info that I need.

Not to mention that My father in law believes in the effectiveness of the flu shot. He bases this on the fact that I have not got one, and I got sick, and his wife got sick, and didn't get one. He got a flu shot and didn't get sick. Therefore he must be right. You can't even argue with that because they just look at you blankly with those deer-eyes that say, "i'll belive whatever the fucking doctor tells me."

you know what. lets change it up, because I could keep going on him. and i'm not wanting to do that.

So, I went to the meeting after that. I was all prepared to give them a piece of my mind because they took away my coffee shop from me, no warning, no expression of discontent with the way that I was running it. Just a kick. AND they inform me of this by EMAIL. While I'm in Scotland, and can't very well do much to argue my point or position. Fuckers.

And while I know it can't be changed back, I still feel the need to stand up for myself and say something. I was all prepared and I walked in to a room full of new people.

Fuck.

Now, I love and hate new people in the organization. We NEED new people because the regular staff are getting stretched too thin. However, new people can't seem to understand that we aren't morons. We've tried all the approaches that they seem to have 'new ideas' about. We keep saying, "we've tried that, What we need is manpower. we don't need you to put more work on us. you have a 'new' idea? Think it'll work better this time? THEN DO IT." Please. I really mean that. Empower yourself, get your ass off the chair and show me that you can fucking work.

But, on the other hand, I understand. There are questions to any new person, there are answers to those questions. But it just seems like a never ending excercise.

And when I was introduced, "This is Hawk, She's our photographer" They were all like " Why do we need a photographer?" Why can't everyone just submit their pictures?

And I'm thinking, "Well fucking hello to you to."

And I'm interpretting in my very patient mode what would happen if someone found themselves on a pagan website without permission.

I get permission. I respect people's boundaries. I get to know people, and no offense or conceit in the next statement, MY PICS ARE BETTER! A lot of the pictures that people submit just aren't interesting in a PR sort of way. This isn't about How much fun 'you' had, it's about the event, AND the fun had at the event.

And it's not like they 'just asked to be friendly' They asked in the tone of 'Her job's really not that neccessary.'

So I answered in the 'Back the fuck off of my job' tone.

Bitch.

And I know these new people.

They are a gaggle of bitches from cinci who are all not pleased with their own group so they are going to come to our group. Do I feel threatened? No. I am perturbed.

Remember last year when we had that 'hostile takeover'? Well the guy who instigated that last year is now in jail, for four counts of aggravated arson. Four fires. Because he broke up with his girlfriend. One of the houses the girl and her brother were in when he lit it on fire.

The guy has gone completely off the fucking end.

And, I'm somewhat pissed because the guy who said, ' oh no, i don't want to run for another term of president, i am grooming someone to come after i do... blah blah fucking blah.'

is now AGAIN president.

Same guy who got pissy because I wouldn't let him into bed with me. Same guy who promised me rides to columbus to go to meetings if i moved to cinci. Same guy who had me waiting for three hours at a McDonalds in a strange city while he was shagging his new girlfriend before we went to a meeting (the only one he ever drove me to) Same guy who's deliberately avoided my phone calls and my submissions When I gave them directly to him, (because I couldn't go to a meeting) and did not bother to bring up those submissions because they were not in line with the agenda that he has.

*whew*

So, why stay?

Well, I've been the official photographer for quite a while now, and I am doing this because I want to use that on my resume when I actually go out into the 'real' world. for something other than weddings.

not to mention that I have poured so much into this group that I am loath to see it go down the drain.

my plan of action is this, Go in. Do my job. Get the credit. Influence what I can. Try to encourage the members who are my friends and that have been chased off to come back.

request that a change be added to our bi laws limiting presidents to one or two terms.

Nominate a new person at election time.

If a new person is not president, i best be on to the next best thing.

grr.

so, i'm done bitching.

but that's whats going on.

love ya
x

Posted by hawkie at December 7, 2003 09:35 PM