4:45a.m., I stumble into the bathroom contemplating snooze and decide against it. I still have my head against the wall. Sleep taunts me. I know it will be cold this morning. I layer my clothing appropriately. I set the alarm for John and grab the timer before entering the cold. I love walking at five a.m. If I wasn't awake before I opened the door. I am awake when I close it. I attempt to take a deep breath. My lungs recoil upon encountering the assault of crisp morning air. I can not seem to draw the long breath I desire.
I begin to walk anyways. In the mornings, everyone is asleep. I feel less conspicuous about working out. The dark makes me uneasy, but I walk with purpose and not with fright. I will not call a negative situation to me. I begin jogging. I love jogging. I jog intermittently. I am not yet able to jog for a very long time. I will jog for a bit. Then taper to a brisk walk. I jog until I am out of breath. I feel like a fish in muddy water forcing the thick, cold, air through my lungs. When my lungs have taken their fill, I begin jogging again. It is a wonderful torture. I have not been able to jog or run since high school. I look forward to the evening of heartbeat and breath to only take off jogging again. Smiling.
Posted by hawkie at February 17, 2004 05:07 PM:D