New Leaves

As the burger flips, cont'd

NARRATOR:
When we last left, everything had gon amuk (amuk! amuk! amuk) ahem. Today, we shall pick up with that same sentiment.
The always punctual (lightning wasn't called for on this set) Hawk arrives at work 1/2 hour early, hoping to 'weez' on the diet coke and 'chill' for a half hour before starting the daily grind.

HAWK: (kisses hubby, leaves car, rings door bell at back door) brrrr. it sure is cold out here. They need to hurry up and get their ass to the door.

NARRATOR: (Cue Simon and Garfunkel) Little does HAWK know, but the sound of silence is all she will hear as she waits in the cold for half an hour. Because....(cue alarming sound dun dun dun) ANOTHER ONE OF HER MANAGERS HAS QUIT WITH OUT NOTICE. That's right vinehumpers, that makes three within the last two months. And to make her morning extra special BLOODY MARY (aka big Area supervisor with a pension for rolling heads) is managing the open of the store. (cue extra alarming sound with a twist of impending doom: dun... duh.. dunnnnnn duhn dud dud dud)

HAWK: (Sees BLOODY MARY'S vehichle) Fuck.

OTHER CO WORKERS: (also waiting in cold) brrrr. Fuck.

BLOODY MARY: (football coach of a loosing team attitude) Ok everyone! Let's get in! It's 7:00. We have an 'open' to perfrom. And today, we are going to do it the right way. HAWK, what is the right way

(zoom in on HAWK as she randomly freaks out, wondering which of the 10 different ways will be the right way today.)

HAWK: umm... errrr. There's packets in the back that we can use...

BLOODY MARY: WRONG!! (Cue the : eee!!! eeee!!! EEE!!! sound) (Addressing as though HAWK is a child) It's not your fault you weren't shown the right way. I'll show you the right way. THIS is the right way. Now go! You have 45 minutes to complete your task. And I don't care if I have everyone set up all fucked up so that you can't get to your station. It only takes 45 minutes and you will do it. OK!?

HAWK: um... are we talking about the realistic plane or the theoretical plane, because I'd really not like to lie when I respond.

BLOODY MARY: Lie to me HAWK. Tell me you will finish this impossible task in 45 minutes. It's the only thing that will get me off your ass this morning.

HAWK: (lies through teeth) I'll have it done in less!

BLOODY MARY: Good. Now, onto my next victim..... T-man...

T-MAN: (under breath) Oh fuck, maybe if I ignore her and run the other way, maybe just maybe she won't pick my ass to ride all morning.

BLOODY MARY: T-MAN! There you are! (as if she'd been looking allll over for him when in fact she singled him out like a wounded elk)

T-MAN: Hail Mary...

BLOODY MARY: Wrong Mary.

T-MAN: I'd try anything at this point.

BLOODY MARY: Guess what WE'RE doing today??? (whips out list that falls to floor... cue the EEEE !!! EEE !!! EEEE!!! music)

OTHER CO WORKERS: (guilty sigh of relief that it's not their ass) Thank God!

NARRATOR: enter the moment when something again falls on HAWK smashing her finger so hard she cant even issue explicatives. The words come to the tongue but never are released. Kind of like vomiting with your mouth shut.

HAWK: (dances around with hand looking more like she has to pee than she hurt herself) mmfff ffmmmffmmmfmmmm gggghhh!!!!!!!!!

NARRATOR: When suddenly, from the back of the store, hearing the potential workers comp claim rend the air, BLOODY MARY appears out of nowhere.

BLOODY MARY: did you cut yourself?.... Did you cut yourself!!????

HAWK: (Still doing the mute-pee-pee dance) mffffffmmmff!! mfffff!!

BLOODY MARY: DID YOU CUT YOURSELF?

HAWK: (shakes head) mmmfff.mmfff...f..fmmf..f..smashed finger..mfff.mmmfff

BLOODY MARY: (Instantly relieved)oh. is that it? Are you done with that impossible job yet?

HAWK: (Employing tactic: get area manager off back, yet again) Almost!

NARRATOR: Later that day, Area manager decides that she is going to be extra brutal, and perform an SOE... which basically means she's going to pick the hell out of the store, and stand over every person for a good 20 minutes while they do their job. There's so much more vinehumpers. There's a snitch.... a spy, an agent of BLOODY MARY'S disguised as the repairman who will make sure the person who graced him with such looks (that's right the area manager is his mama) knows everything. Not one burger is getting flipped by a left handed person today. No siree. All right handed people flip burgers. Everyone knows that.

BLOODY MARY: I heard that we had a left hander on our grill today. Now, we can't do that, the proper way to flip a hamburger can only be executed by a right hand.

CURRENT MANAGER:common sense common sense common sense

BLOODY MARY: now, now... my way is common sense. it is even better than common sense it is passed on to me by the spirit of the founding person... from me to you... only flip this with your right hand. And consequently, they are telling me from the afterlife, that the world is indeed flat.

NARRATOR: even later that day...

MANAGER: I have five people clocking out at four, perhaps I should see that things are ready so that they can leave.... Nahhh. I'd rather b.s with the area manager since she digs me.

NARRATOR: It is four o'clock, there are people who are trying to reach the time clock, but are cut off.

MANAGER: You can not pass....(grills flame up really high, and you will ignore that they are electric grills and not gas grills, as we are going for effect....flames are really high.... on both sides) I am the wielder of the sacred paycheck the enabling force of write ups, you must count your cash or take the risk of being short...

(COWORKERS edge slowly towards time clock)

MANAGER: YOU... SHALL NOT PASSSSSSS!!!

(Some of the coworkers inch back and cower, the others employ a distraction)

COWORKERS: Look! It's Christmas (The code for 'there's a really hot guy or girl, depending on your preference in the drive thru)

(Manager looks, a handful of employees make their breaks. But some are bound to cash registers and fall back like a dog who thinks they have more leash)

MANAGER: (approaches HAWK) ummm

HAWK: (Knows instinctively that they are going to ask her to stay later.) I'm not staying.

MANAGER: (starts to walk away) ok...

HAWK: (Confused and annoyed at being denied entertainment by begging manager) Ok, I'll stay till 5 (settles for brief look of joy/relief on their face)

MANAGER: (Brief look of joy/relief)

NARRATOR: Earlier that day, a co-worker and a person of higher rank, which, if i might add, may or may not be a previously mentioned character :coughmanagercoug: enter the walk in:

DIVA: (Looks for bacon turns around and finds herself alone with the man of her dreams... current dreams.) Oh my.

PERSON OF HIGHER RANK: We are all alone..

DIVA: That, we are (gets closer)So what shall we do?

PERSON OF HIGHER RANK: (pins them ever so carefully against the walk in door) I am sure I can answer that question without a word

DIVA: But, what about your wife?

PERSON OF HIGHER RANK: shhhh. she doesn't exist here. it is only us. us and the thawing french fries... Sieze the moment Diva! Let me whisk you away from your baby's daddy... ( passionately kisses (their version of passionate as you will find out later) her)

DIVA: woo hoo!

(Later)

HAWK: (Doing her job) hodee hodee hodee humm

J-MAN: HAWK, I like being spanked. I'll do your dishes if you boss me around.
and I'm wearing a kilt for halloween, i've only mentioned a few times to you before because what I really want you to know is that you are probably gonna get flashed the family jewels since I'm also an exhibitionist.

HAWK: ( 0-0 ) umm. that's nice. I'm going to be over here. (thinks) Actually... DO MY FUCKIN DISHES BITCH! (spanks with spoon, then enhances calm.)... now, i'm going to go over there.

DIVA: HAWK, I got kissed again, I got kissed again!

HAWK: Playing with fire and eventually you will burn your fingers.

DIVA: oh, I know what I'm doing?

HAWK: Riiiiight, you turn 18 when?

DIVA: One week!

HAWK: ok... so rate it. 1-10

DIVA: 6

HAWK: ( Who is used to having curled toes) 6? (crinkles nose.)

DIVA: (Crinkles nose back) I know... maybe that's a sign.

HAWK: Yeah, do not pass go. do not collect.

DIVA: But still, I have a crush!

HAWK: oi. Look. I'm gonna be over here performing the job of three people. You keep that over there. okee?

DIVA: Okee.

NARRATOR: Allrighty then, that wraps it up for todays episode of 'As the burger flips.' We still have a few things up in the air. Will they ever find the fire extinguishers? Will BLOODY MARY leave before another head rolls? What did HAWK do when she went home?

(she edited four pages out of her book. go her)

hmmm

So, I'm awake now. I slept for ten hours. I would have slept longer if we didn't have alarm clock issues. I am listening to random things on Johns computer.... his has the surround sound that I love so much. I have a wee headache, but I'm sure that'll pass as I am drinking water by the buttload.

The temperature and cloud cover today is almost exactly the same as it was in Scotland. It turns out the patio is getting more and more use, as John and I like to go outside and enjoy the weather.

Currently, I am debating going to columbus tonight and getting more stuff out of the storage unit. Not sure.... Now that I've seen it, it's nagging at me. I want to finish it. Be done with it. This weekend, John's parents are coming, so I'm always prompted to be more domestic and generally (try not to) freak out about what they'll think about the house. No, It's not neccessarily the healthiest perspective, but still I want the house to be just right.

I've been reading some interesting things about health, medical healing and holistic healing. I love to read radical things. I can just feel my brain stretching. Dr Richard Schulze is someone I've loved to read for a while. Since I had pneumonia in 98/99, I was introduced to his stuff. And reading it did save my life. I'm convinced. I didn't do his full blown program, I just took his advice on what to do if you are sick, and I was better within two weeks. So, I always thought, if I had the money, I'd buy his literature and read up. Still don't have the money ( I won't get depressed by that thought ) so, I take to reading what's on line. Finally after several years, he's managed to win a right to have a website with his radical statements and herbal formulae. (He had a clinic that was shut down by the government) And so, I'm stoked to learn what herbs do what, etc etc, from someone I feel, 'knows his stuff'.

I have consumed 44+ ounces of water, headache fading, dry mouth prevalent. I think I might be trying to catch a cold.

Decision about storage unit, it'll wait till next week. No need to be superwoman.

Anyone else have this much trouble trying to be balanced between responsible and fun?

Currently Domestic

At the moment, I feel domestic. I woke up and baked a double batch of fresh cinnamon rolls with butter cream icing and took them into work. They loved it. Totally devoured. Right now, my stomach is growling because it smells the beans and garlic that I've got going on for my dinner. It's about five different kinds of beans that I'm mixing with the baked garlic that Pipsie was ever so kind to introduce me to. Since then, I get garlic almost every time I go to the store. I am trying to be more aware of myself and my health, and what I make for food. John's getting pot pies... he doesn't like mixed beans. I likes them a lot. I can eat them every night.

I just got the garlic out of the oven, mashed it up, mixed it with my mixed beans and it is indeed, very good.

Today we got a new manager. And Our supervisor was there as well. It was absolutely crazy. I walked in, and everyone was just about frantic. I'm like, 'Oh Jeez.' For some reason, the supervisor likes me. Not that I'm unlikeable, just she doesn't seem to like many people. And the new manager was not making himself friendly. I say hi 'directly to him' and he didn't say a damn thing. I interpret that as, "fuck off".

(damn, I wish I'd made more garlic and beans... Probably won't later, but it was really good.)

I made real sure to be assertive about not being able to clock off at the proper time. i.e., 'If I can't leave on time today, and make it to somewhere that closes by five, I'll be in late tomorrow after I take care of business.' The area supervisor was very adamant that this problem was going to be fixed.

I was like, 'Please note my availability has changed.'

Excellent. Work four days a week, off for three. One day a week specifically for my creative ventures. One day for relaxing, One day for errands.

This will be sooo awesome.

Anyhow, I wanted to mention that yesterday John and I went to the storage unit. I had been dreading this trip because I was sure that it was going to be horridly packed full, and it was just a monster I didn't want to face. John puts the gate up, and I say, 'Oh, That's not so bad.' And its true. Not bad at all. John was only interested in getting the TV and VCR. I wanted to stuff the car, and only managed to partly fill it. Since he was in a hurry and had to get to a bathroom. That I can understand... However, I am going to go alone next time because I want to go through things and determine what I want/ can part with/ can give away/ can throw away.

Pitcheroo time.
Own your posessions. Do not let them own you.

Anyhow. John and I drove up together, and it was really nice drive, we talked a lot, and managed to work out a couple things, and understand each other and our goals a little more. We stopped by my sister's house, but she was out. I left my new information, and inquired how my sister Kassandra is doing, since she's about 8.5 months along in her pregnancy.

We drove home and stopped at a pumpkin patch, at which, I oooohed and ahhhhed. and was so excited about how fresh and big the pumpkins were. But then I went inside and saw a display that had a carved pumkin next to a witch-scare-crow, and the carved pumpkin said 'Satan'.

Satan has nothing to do with halloween. I walked directly out. People who put that sort of stereotype, are the type of people who burned 'witches'. I don't even want to go in the whole reason. Just suffice it to say, I was miffed, and I wasn't going to buy a pumpkin there.

When we got back, I put nearly everything away. I still have a couple of things I'm procrastinating on. I'm tired of putting things away, it would seem, but I know that this won't be forever, and pretty soon, we'll be on to the maintenance phase.

I talked to Pat a bit last night. I think I tried to convince her to connect her flights through Cinci Airport, and when she does, she had to bring me some Cristos Feta. :drool:

I also pulled up my book last night. I was going to work on the editing. I want to just be done with it allready.

I feel tired. I hope I sleep well...
love you

Cooking For American Homemakers

I have this excellent cookbook. It's about as thick, if not thicker, than my Lord of the Rings Trilogy book. It's an old cookbook that was first released in the fifties. But its a revised edition, so the copy I have is dated 1968. And I love this cookbook. It is refreshing. I know this might sound strange, but I like to READ it. This would be June Cleaver's cookbook.... if she ever needed one. Who wants to bet the Cleavers were kinky?

I am suddenly struck with the desire to watch Leave it to Beaver for all the double entendre. The title alone is plenty.

Ahem, anyhow, I read this cookbook Just to see what it has in it. It teaches me. I feel like I am doing time travel when I look at the pictures and read the descriptions. Everything you could possibly need to know on entertaining company, or even, cooking for two.

I never noticed before, but this big double page sign in the book says "Culinary Arts Institute encylopedic Cookbook"

Dude, I just turned the page, and I found a recipe for making mayonnaise. It has the best recipe I've found for Chocolate Chip Cookies. They aren't chewy, but they aren't crispy. They rise real high. The are *so* good.

I've thought about putting things like this in my journal... a recipe here or there.

I have one other cookbook that I swear by. Not Just Beans. Excellent. I would say it's an old fashioned recipe book for the modern person.

but I'll skip the, 'how to dress wild game' portion of it. spare myself, whiles i spares yous. *shudder*

ok love you
xxx

overtime bitches

Work called. I was making crepes. All mornings should start of with the brilliance I managed. I made crepes ala peanutbutter banana. Take crepe, smear w/ peanutbutter, slice banana on it. Roll it, drizzle a wee bit of syrup. Kick Ass! I'm totally stoked.

Well, while I was making pancakes... work called. Asked me to come in. I waited about an hour (after breakfast) and called them back, played coy. "What do you need?" "Can you work 11-3, or till 4? (aka 4:30)" I proceed to ask who I've got to work next too (aka is spoiled brat working) "I was going to keep you two at opposite ends of the store. "Well, you have to tell Terrance, that you are my bitch." Ok. Manager walks up to Terrance, "Terrance, I am Linda's bitch." "Linda?" "Yeah, you know Linda." "Tell her I'm pissed because I wanted to be her bitch."

So now I go to work with my bitches.
Probably be on line tonight around 5pm, 10pmGST... if Miss Pipsie isnt asleep I sure hope to meet up with her.

Lil miss muffet sat on her tuffet
cubering on msn
hawk logged on,
she logged off
you better log back in again (bitch) :P

love you guys

i expect to see new entries from lava and moggie and dusty
, and i could wish from liz.... are you still out there?

the good the bad, and the disgruntally clean

I have survived bathing all four of the cats. I bathed Hemlock and Silas to the soundtrack of TTT. Which, I don't think was the best choice of soothing music. Thre were times I am sure that it only inspired the 'I'm going to die' feelings in my poor cats. I put Enigma in for Scruffy, who invented new words with his different ways to pronunciate 'meow'. reeeeeowwrreerhhhhhhhhhhhowwwuhhhhhhhhhhhhrrrrrrrr

but Manna always takes it worst. I have debated taping her paws as she always seems to sink her claws in me. There's absolutely no grace to bathing Manna. I hate to do it because of how she reacts, but it has to be done. So, in the water.... rreoowww... avoid claws, don't care if you get wet, just avoid those two weapons.... put her up on counter to soap her up... she starts looking at me and I suddenly get a telepathic image from her wee nogin to mine, 'Roy and Tiger'.....Then it's squeeze ass load of special kitty shampoo on counter, and roll her in it. Just kidding. It's squeeze assload of shampoo on kitty, but partly miss kitty, so counter gets it....soapy soapy... fling water (stay away from claws) to help with the suds.... soapy soapy..... then the inevitable rinse..... then the cuddle with the, 'im disgruntled, don't think i'm going to forget this, bitch' and me feeling badly, and nursing about three different places she still managed to get me.

Now to clean up the mess. The ferret is much more cooperative.
:P

We'll be singing, when we're winning.

John is studying programming, and he's taken the penguins on the ice, the one where one is walking by, and the other smacks him, and the poor penguin falls in the icy water... he's got that programmed to play with the song, "Tub Thumpin" It's cute.

I was going to journal something today. but I can't really remember. I was miffed that work kept me 1 hour over today. So, I changed my availability for them. Its their fault. If they want to continuously do this, keep me an hour over because my replacement isn't there, or ask me to work extra hours (equating to 10hour-14hour shifts)Then this is what happens. They can only do this to me four days a week. Then I've got to do something to be able to have my own scheduled time.

I've decided that 4 days a week, I'll work, I'll bust my ass. (not that I don't, I'm just not as dedicated and motivated as I'd like to be) and 1 day, I'll take care of the household stuff (with John) like bills, grocery, laundry, etc. and one day a week will be working on my photography business, my writing, my art, myself.

I really wanted to get home today because I knew Pipsie would have her internet up and running. But alas, I missed her. Dammit.

Theres tommorrow. I'll get up early and hopefully catch her.

Well, I can't stay on here long tonight rambling about things, i have to go and torture my kitties. bath time. i've procrastinated long enough.

love you all
xxx

I know you did not just do that.

The next person in line for their asswhooping by me, would be Kid Rock for his mutilating interpretation/remake of 'I Feel Like Makin' Love.'

I will now be avoiding the radio completely since the last Kid Rock song was overplayed to point of dimensia at the first strains.

Fucker.

As the burger flips.

Ever have someone you work with irritate the fuck out of you on a constant basis? I do. I consider myself a relatively friendly person. I can get along with most anyone. But those people that I can't get along with, they grate me. I nearly have a problem with her every time she works. She's rude, insubordinate to the management, spends time on the phone while people are waiting for her, mouths off to everyone. I caught her doing something at work that pisses me off. I told her nicely two days before, 'rinse the bacon pan. or you put more grease in that water than there is dish soap.' She (and everyone else) won't rinse dishes. I'm left with a tower, and I'm not going to do them the fast way, because they don't get clean that way. So I called her on it and she flipped out on me. I worded it nicely, "Did you rinse that?" And she went off in a tirade... "YES I KNOW YOU MENTIONED IT YESTERDAY, NO I DIDN'T. I'M NOT HELPING BACK HERE ANYMORE IF ALL I DO IS GET YELLED AT". I'm like "There's no need for you to be rude." She continued flipping out. On the first day that she started work, she was talking about how, "this wasn't a real job, and she's so much better than this." etc etc etc.

I have practiced enornous amounts of restraint with her. So today when she got an attitude with me and SNATCHED something out of my hand. I said, "You better never snatch anything out of my hands again like that, or it's on." I was gonna kick her ass. The manager comes up to me and says, "What's wrong?" I say,"If you don't pull her in line, I'll fuck her up." (I am not a violent person. honestly, but don't treat me like I'm worse than chewing gum on your shoe for over a month. I'd had enough, It probably would have just resorted to a verbal lashing that I've managed to keep from spilling... barely.) He asks me to explain, all the while he's snickering. He says," I'll take care of it, but can you just say again, "I'll fuck her up."? I really enjoyed that coming from you. That was like Linda-ghetto-speak. C' mon, do it again." Which should vouch for me that I'm not usually agressive.

ai.

i really just want to tell her to fuck off and quit lying about her 'sugar problem' which she has to take breaks for. Newsflash, you don't take breaks. You eat something. You work in a fucking restaurant. Grab a little something, eat it, you'll be fine. It's what I do. Lazy brat.

I just refuse to be treated like something that she can walk on. uh uh.

....
....
....

i feel a wee bit better now. :P

I am now trying to find two outfits for the male managers in my store who have agreed (at my prodding) to dress in drag.

heheheheh

I have another one telling me he'll wear his kilt.

I'm still gonna be a hobbit. :)

I hate banks.

but on the good side...

I GOT PAID TODAY!!! MONEY YAY!!!
I FEEL LESS POOR!!

WOOHOOO

And, I've been invited to a halloween party.
And I lovessssssss so very much dressing up.

love you
xxx

An entry for those over the age of 18. If you aren't, I'm gonna tell your momma

Today started out oddly. I woke up in a ball. I don't usually do that. But I figured out what it was as soon as conciousness set in. Cramps. Wha? I don't get cramps. Not like this at least. That's the very reason I won't take the pill because the cramps make me feel like my abdomen in a constant, aching hollow. bleah.

But, cramps are for rejoicing, because if my system is trying to do something by itself. More power to it. So I whined a bit here and there this morning. I believe I even developed and overly dramatic point as I lay next to the clock-ing in area. 'Please remove it all.' Glad that's over. I've been taking some vitamins, supplements, and herbals which are recommended for various things like PMS, PCOS, and hormonal imbalances in general. The thought came to me after I realized that the doctor prescribed me vitamins, and not a medication for a few things. If you are anemic, they give you iron. If you have a funny line on your EKG, they tell you eat more calcium, magnesium, and potassium. So I visited Soulcysters where it is a message board full of women who have my condition, or friends and family, etc, etc. I looked up homeopathic info, and then I went searching for things that were a bit more specific to me.

I take my herbals, vitamins, and minerals about 2-3 times a day. Depending on how and when I eat. I don't want to count my chickens before they hatch. So let's just say we are hopeful that this may help. Don't know to what degree. But I definately hope it's helping.

Take pills and chart. Take pills and chart.

So, today, I was looking up, 'Health benefits of Garlic' Every since Pipsie turned me on to baked Garlic, I have had a renewed interest in it's healing properties. I looked up 'recommended fiber intake'. Only I can look up as simple as 'recommended fiber intake' and find something like that. It must be a gift.

The result of my searches are to take the following:
Women's vitamin with iron
magnesium calcium zinc combo
Soya Lecithin
Dong Quai

Now, my manager took the piss outta me today for taking anything that comes in a bottle with the word 'dong' on it. We were all visiting new levels of immaturity as I (when I got over my cramps I went uber hyper mode) went around and demanded that everyone dress up for Halloween. I have two of the male managers dressing in drag ( go me ) and I'm thinking I'll just be a hobbit again. Wish I could get me some fake ears from one of these costume stores. All the talk of Halloween led Gail and I to start talking about Rocky Horror Picture Show. And then we were singing it. Next thing you know, our other co workers were accusing the two of us of hogging the happy juice.

I'm outta here, I've been informed, I'm getting a full body massage.
:P

I'm just gonna have to learn to hesitate...

I talked to my father tonight. If you vine humpers rmember, that's usually cause for distress. I love my father dearly. However I usually find myself in a mental quandry after a conversation with him. A year ago, I went out on Tuesday nights so that I didn't have to get into too deep of a conversation with him. I couldn't handle his questions and or advice at the time. It was a really hard time of year for me. Last year at this time, John and I were on our way to a separation. I thought we'd be divorced by now.

Well. Unfortunately, my father is the one that got divorced. The bitch took him to the cleaners. She and I better never meet up. Dad went to counselling for so long... with her. I know that no one is perfect, but I know my father will go out of his way to do the right thing. She managed to find a new job just in time to go with her car that my father paid off, to go with her credit card bills that my father paid off. (after not working for 16 months, collecting unemployment and blowing money the whole time) and she took nearly everything out of the house. She took lightbulbs. Lightbulbs. He got the house and his car, which he had to have refinanced and is working overtime to pay for.

To say I am annoyed is the understatement.

Dad was worried about me because he hadn't heard from us in a while, and I explained that I was gone, and that everything went weird where we had lived. When I told him that I was in Scotland for a month, he said, "No wonder I hadn't heard from you."

Wasn't for lack of trying. I cant ever remember his phone number. I'm pretty sure I'm blocking it :P

Today was rather uneventful after work. I spent two hours on the phone with my father, and now I am of a desire to just relax, as my feet are still hurting.

John is catching some overtime tomorrow. I'm glad for that. They are ordering him uniforms and asking him to work more hours. I'm going to take that for a good sign that he'll be hired on permanently.

It seems that we are settling very nicely into this townhome. I really love it. I have managed to break a few things unpacking them. And my swedish crystal has a nick in it. grr. And my amethyst geode has broken in a few spots. double grr. but i am glad that a few things that were breakable, but packed in a laundry basket (did I do that?) otherwise made it.

Note to self:
No more packing in laundry baskets.

better yet
no more packing. live here for a long time :P

Well, I swept off the back patio and put up our plastic patio set. John and I ate dinner out there on Sunday. That was very nice. We seem to have a chipmunk, who I've named Alvin, and he's a reoccuring visitor. So, I've left birdseed out there for him and it's gone when I come back. Little thief.

There is a tree that has grown in front of our townhome and it pretty much covers things. You have to duck a bit under it to step onto the sidewalk leading up to my door. It's like a canopy. The branches extend past my bedroom window, combined with the blinds, complete privacy. We leave the windows open upstairs. It's that time of year right now where it's perfect to leave the windows open all night, all day, and crickets sing me to sleep. :)

Everything is seeming to come together and I can breathe again. I hate fretting. Fretting sucks.

love you all
xxx

Seeing Red Again

Last night when I was so bored, I decided to cook dinner instead of actually baking. I forgot one of the biggest pains in the ass of moving into a new place, and not having most of your kitchen stuff, going to the grocery store is a never ending battle. I got the shortenning, but forgot the oil, walked past the eggs, didn't have apples for the apple muffins, and then didn't know I didn't have flour. Can someone tell me when Aluminum foil went up so high in price?

I was going to bake after dinner. I sat down with my cook books looked at everything and then decided that i had to get some oil. By the time I came back, I just resigned myself to relaxing, and I henna-ed my hair. So now, it is indeed red again! I love henna-ing my hair. Its not so even of a coat this time, but when I do it again in 14 days, It'll fix itself. It's so good for your hair. It covered the bit of grey that I was developing at my right temple. By the time I'm fifty, I'll have all grey hair. My mother nearly does. I'm starting in her pattern. I'm sure that's where it's headed.

Today, I woke up, didn't hit snooze, jumped in the shower and proceeded to let the henna goop rinsed outta my hair. Well, it doesn't always come out with one shampoo. So three shampoos later, I get the majority of it out, then go on to the conditioner. It takes a good half hour to do this. I get out, look at the mirror and see that i've missed a glob.

It's this dance every time, but it's worth it.

Gosh, my hair is REALLY red. It's been a while.

Then, I go downstairs and make sausage and egg sandwhiches for John. Make his lunch, and then make spaghetti, then make mashed potatoes with chilis, black beans and garlic for my dinner. Put both of them in foil, and now, I don't have to cook when I get home. Just turn on the oven, pop them in, wait forty five minutes. I cook, he does the dishes and wipes everything down.

Gotta run
xxxx
I found the rest of my candles last night. I think. I'm not sure what I threw out and what I didn't.

Its a weird day

I had a dream this morning. I dreamed that I was in a movie. Not acting in a movie, but just in a movie. Probably a very boring movie, as nothing that I remember resembled a plot. I was like Truman, but I knew I was being filmed. I was on a bus. Standing. I was not sure where I was. Then things became more familiar. I started shouting, "Honey it's Glasgow! It's Glasgow, I'm back! Driver, Let me off here!" Much to my dismay, we drove through Glasgow, but the driver wouldn't stop to let me out. Weird.

Or, Perhaps you could take John's dream about kangaroos at the zoo pissing in circles on children. Then the child returning fire.

There isn't a cloud in the sky, and it's at least 70 degrees here. It's absolutely beautiful out, but all I want to do is be inside. I don't know why it's a weird day. It just feels weird. I feel weird. Do you ever feel weird, and not know why you don't want to do anything? I'm not depressed, I'm not down. I'm not exhausted. I'm not hungry. I'm just *here*. And being *just here* feels weird. I will probably still do the laundry, but I do not have any desire to go up to the storage unit. So, I talked John into staying here with me today. I just want to be home.

I hate it when I'm clingy.

I have finally found the person with my bank in which to file a complaint. Four days for processing. I have so had it with them.

I might bake. Yeah. I think I'll go bake something.

Redneck Yuppie

So far, so good. I've managed to clear the living room of all boxes and clutter.
I tossed out a few things today even though some people would have a caniption. An old CD player/ cassette player/ stereo. The CD player didn't work anymore, and I wrote a sign on it and put it right in front of the dumpster. Somebody might want it. Somebody only waited for me to leave the dumpster before picking it up and taking it right into their house. I later knocked on the door and gave them about five, very nice baskets that I really have no use for.

I was able to set everything up in the living room and debate wether or not I really wanted to keep the rocking chair. I think I'm going to deposit that in front of the dumpster too. I didn't want it in the first place. I managed to unearth some of my candles and incense. I lit some incense and put on some Pink Floyd. Then I marched up the stairs and insisted that the husband unit of this family go downstairs and make many comments about how nice it looked.

Give this wife the deserved praise. Thank you.

Then we went to a matinee showing (cheaper) of Kill Bill. I love that movie. I love Quentin Tarentino. I love the soundtrack. I am not usually a big fan of Uma Therman. I've never had any problem with work she's done, I just thought she never stood out to me before. In this movie, I thought she did some of the very best acting that I've ever seen. I thought it was overly gorey in some parts. But, I believe that goes with Quentin. I felt that it was like watching a moving piece of art. One of the reasons I like Quentin Tarentino is that he challenges me to like something that I would normally not like.

John and I just about throttled a dude who didn't turn off his cell phone. It rang in a very bad part. To add to the crappy timing of the phone call, the guy decides he's going to have a conversation. We proceeded to tell him to shut the fucking phone off. I mean, if you're gonna take calls in a movie, set it to vibrate, and if you insist on talking, leave the fucking theatre. Don't be an asshole. I called him a redneck yuppie. This is Kiiin tuck ay, Ah Ken karree a cell pho en, butt ah caint read wan da skreen sez to tern et awf.

asshole.

Moving on

Another bonus to watching an excellent movie, is that I got to see The Trailer. and in case you don't know of what I speak, I would be talking about Return of the King. Woo hoo! Kick ass. Rock.

Also got to see the trailer for Matrix Revolutions.

I talked to John's mom for a bit today, we got into the conversation about the war. Not a good idea for me because there are people who insist that there is evidence to connect the WTC tragedy with Saddam, and our right to go in there. Not going to carry the conversation over to here, but let's just say, she and I were on opposite sides of the fence. It was interesting to listen to the news in the UK, and how it differs from our news, and our perspectives. Especially regarding the war.

Just when I thought that I was all done with the grocery store, I walk by the eggs. I was concentrating so hard on not getting anything that wasn't on my list that I missed something that was on my list. :P

And I've overcome the ultimate test.

Trial Size on sale.

A Drug Emporium store is going out of business here, and I went in there because I had to pick up my vitamins. Everything was 40% off.

And there they were. Staring at me in their perfect little tiny bottles. Calling to me. I resisted. But the experience has left me marred.

Tomorrow, we go to the storage unit to get a carload of stuff. Not really wanting to do that since my living room now looks so loverly. I dinna wanna put anything else away. But, what has to be done, has to be done. Putting it off will only weigh on your mind.

The joys of trying to accept responsibility.

more of the same

Bet you can't guess what I'm doing today... That's right! MORE unpacking :P

I will mention, with delight that I was able to situate enough things to reach the window in the front room. I then conjured up a window treatment that would make Marth (who is evil, btw, and i knew that before the scandal) say, "Why didn't I think of that?" I don't think it will stay like that. Its a little too rich for my personal tastes, but eventually, it will evolve with the rest of the living room. I want to put light pastel colors in there. I want that room to be inviting, not intimidating. Which means, that eventually, I must cover that VERY dark couch. :P

I believe I'll be somewhat done with the living room today, and then it's on to bathing the cats and the ferret, then scrubbing, with BLEACH (diluted of course) their things. I'll leave it at that. Crud, I've got to get a scrubbie.

If you gather that I obsess over cleaning, you would be right. I figure there are worst things to obsess over.

Now, on to one of the interesting facts that I've found out while continuing my search for herbal medicine.

"Caffeine is a stimulant, but in large doses it becomes a depressant."

Whoah Nelly, stop the presses.

"Say it ain't so, my love is a heartbreaker."

Yes, I'm being dramatic, but I loves my caffeine, but I had no idea that it fed depression. I have enough trouble fighting the blah's on my own.

I still don't think this is going to stop me from going to the store to get some more diet coke :P

We'll see.

love you all
xxx

Holy mf Jacket Cauliflour Batman

Not doing too bad for my day off. (bless those days off) I went to the store on the way from dropping John off this morning. They had heads of cauliflour so huge, they were bigger than my head. Not to say that my head is big. Nevermind, we won't follow that tangent.

They had heads of cauliflour so big.
(how big were they?)
So big that they would take up the whole vegetable drawer.

Not funny I'm sure, but it amused me. Plus, they were called 'jacket cauliflour' which reminded me of 'jacket potatoes', which is baked potatoes here.

don't ask, just try to follow, even I can't keep up with my own brain.

I was there to pick up tyson chicken leg quarters because they were on sale for 49 cents per pound. I bought fifteen pounds. John will be up to his ears in chicken. But the penny pincher in me is appeased. Temporarily.

I really must be a changed person to walk into lowes, and walk out with nothing. I didn't buy anything from the hardware store. I went in there, got my prices for some plyboard, and got out. I am going to make some desks (eventually, as everything is) for our office so that the computers go in the corners and we use the space more wisely. I had to get dimensions of the plywood so that I could figure out how to have them cut the board :)

We're talking January or so. I've other things to finish before I do that.

I have made a sizeable dent in the unpacking of things. Main goal this weekend is to do the laundry/ go through the clothes, and get up to Columbus to raid the storage unit, at least once. Packing my wee hatchback completey full, and give myself more to unpack. Joy of all joys.

Let this be a lesson. Do not be a packrat, and do not buy things you don't need. Trust me, it's really not worth it in the end.

But the lesson has been learned, if you will count the many times i've gone into stores and not bought anything off my list. I know that this is a continuing exercise, but if I can do this. I can do anything.

Enough rambling.
xxxx

Live and Let Die.

I sent a reply. I kept my calm. I have received silence. Which by the fucking way is the most annoying way to deal with a situation between adults, at least have the decency to clear the air. In this case, I'm certain that it is because someone needs drama. Someone needs a persecutor. I fill that bill. Whatever. So be it. I'm sure I'll feel more hurt about it later when the annoyance is cleared and I miss the person who is now, formerly my friend. At this point, I am going to decide that I can not control that person, or their reactions. No matter what I do. No matter what/How much I've done in the past for them, I can not make them be my friend still. Fine. Live and let die. And what's amazing is I really feel that way. I'm not just saying "fuck them, they don't know what their missing." I'm really saying, "Well, if that's how it is, then that's how it is, and I've done what I can. Ready to move on."

* * * * *

Today was a really long day. I was scheduled to work at 7-4. But I ended up working 7(ish) to 8 PM which is a 13 hour shift. Oi. My aching feet. But I wheeled and dealed when I agreed to work those extra hours. I now have Friday off, in addition to my regularly scheduled Saturday and Sunday off.

In case you missed it, that was the cue for the Hallelujah Chorus.

I can now order my rented washer and dryer units (it's cheaper than two people going to the laundry mat, and there's something to be said about convenience.) To arrive on Friday instead of having to wait until I can schedule a weekday off. They won't deliver on weekends, and they will not guarantee a time that they will deliver. So, I've got to sit and wait for them on Friday. That's cool though. That will work hand in hand with my plans to unpack and get as much done as I possibly can on this weekend. With the goal of relaxing on Sunday evening.

Have I mentioned that I love my foot massager? * Purrrrrrrr*

I did manage to get the kitchen somewhat situated. I'm very pleased that my herbs and spices managed to make it here. Even if my brand new set of measuring cups didn't. (grumble grumble) Comparatively, the herbs and spices much more valuable.

I've been reading lately a few books and tidbits here and there about organization, about relationships. About basically being your own person, and healthier thinking. I have found this information so freeing. A lot of times I think about decisions I've made and how they've landed me where I am. But now I have more hope than I've had in a long time. I actually have developed a new mantra. I used to use: "I'm not gonna bend, I'm not going to break, and I'm not going to worry about it anymore." (yes that is from a counting crowes song) but I've developed, "Today is a new day in which I can and will make better decisions." Thus affecting my tomorrows instead of just 'dealing with things as they come at me.' No adversity in that. No persecutor.

Well enough babble for tonight, I've got to be at work at 7 am tomorrow, and I'm exhausted.

love you
xxxxxxxxxxxx

Sheesh

Well, self assertion sucks sometimes.

As predicted, it didn't go over too well with one of my self asserting situations. I am pained because a friendship may be over. But at the same time, I am thinking, "I don't think it's wrong to question things. Or ask for explanations" Especially when money is involved, and the figures aren't the same as when I went away. And then I think now that if they are ready to toss everything because of this, then they must not really care about me anymore.

I'm of the opinion that some people need drama, and it irks me to think that somehow I've been put in the position of 'persecuting' another person. Even though I've fought for friendly resolution. It's unnerving to me because unfortunately, I care what people think about me. And I have a pretty good feeling the shit's going to be flying about me.

I know I shouldn't care, but I do. I am striving not to care what people who don't bother to ask my side of the story think.

akkkk. :P :P

So, as you can see I'm sommat frustrated.

Today, I had to walk to work in the absolutely pouring rain with very strong winds. From my toes to about halfway up to my knees were completely soaked all day and I couldn't do anything about it. Just squish when I walked. I couldn't wait to get home.

I've asked my boss for a shift change. I would like to work Ten hour shifts, four days a week. This would leave me with three days off, work four. I think I could manage my time better with three days off.

Well. Enough pissing and moaning for the day

i'm outta heyeah
xxxxxxx

Yes, Moggie, Angels are great.

Tonight i was all set to cook dinner, but I've discovered that my stove is not working right. There are pieces missing on them that the electic elements sit on. I am having a moderately hard time practicing miserly habits. Going to the store and getting ONLY WHAT YOU WENT FOR. It's nearly a mental episode, it is sommat reminiscent of Pipsie and Evil Pipsie when she was packing.

Hawk: Ooooh. Candlessss. Make house smell pretty... (fire! fire!)
Miserly Hawk: you don't really need that candle. Really. You've got candles at home.
Hawk: But they are in boxes precious, stupid boxes makes our head hurt trying to find candle. (couldn't resist)
Miserly Hawk: Is it on the list?
Hawk: :( No...
Miserly Hawk: Step away from the candles. What? No!! noo! Noo sniffing! Do you ENJOY torture?
Hawk: Peaches. Vanilla.... I could buy TWO of them and my house would smell sooooo prettyyyyy........
Miserly Hawk: Put the candle down, Get your fuckin mop, broom, scrubby sponges, door mat, and vacuum cleaner bags, and get the fuck out of here.
Hawk: :( Ok.

Repeat when go to grocery store.

But this is something that I MUST learn how to do. I've not been too good at it for a while and I've bought a household full of shite. My mind is boggled to think that I've thrown out half my stuff before, And I *still* have this much left.

aiiii.

No fear. It'll all get put away. Everything is copescetic. However you spell that word. I don't care. That's exactly how it is. Cool, calm.

I did something today that I don't like to do. It makes about three times this week that I've done it. Assert myself FOR myself. In other words, being blunt with rude coworker after she approaches and interrupts a conversation I was having with my manager. I'm not talking about polite interruption. I'm talking about blatant interruption. She comes back to my work area, butts in, and then looks at me and says, "Do you mind if He and I have a conversation in private." Basically asking me to leave. I was like, "I don't mind. If you go somewhere else to have it." My manager can't stand her either. He nearly choked when I said it.

Try that on for size and I liked it.

Next. Coworker talking not getting too much done. Manager says, He won't work if you keep talking to him. I know you can work and talk, but he wants to catch up with you and is falling behind... np. Dude comes back to talk to me. I tell him, "We're gonna have to catch up later. OK?" He was fine with that.

Next... And I don't think that this one is going to go over so smoothly. I've had a bit of an issue confronting someone about a money issue. I was actually willing to pay the money, even though I don't think it's the right amount. Just to avoid an argument and hope that I could still be friends with them. But I find myself saying, (to myself) 'Don't be a pussy. Don't hide your feelings. Don't pay something after you've had to go through this without at least confronting them.' So... i've sent off the e mail, and we'll see how this goes. If we can't work this out. Then the friendship must be gone already and my asserting myself wouldn't have made a difference.

I don't like trying this one on for size. I would rather avoid conflict. Even if it's not conflict yet. And that's a problem. I don't know why I've thought it bad before to assert myself. or to stand up for myself.

My back hurts a wee bit today. I'm sure that it's from where I fell. It's not serious. It doesn't ache or pain me like other things i've had go wrong. this is very much like a bruise or a strain. I am sure it will pass quickly. I just keep stretching.

I slept for ten hours yesterday evening. Verrrrrrry wonderful. I don't plan a repeat of that. I have every intention of getting up tomorrow and doing the kitchen.

love ya
xxxxxxxx

Calling All Angels....

Well, today I was on the receiving end of a miracle. OK, maybe not anything groundshaking. But definately amazing to me.

I fell at work today.

How is that a miracle?

It's a miracle that I didn't seriously hurt myself given the situation and circumstances. It was the strangest, wildest fall that I've ever experienced. I'm placing a large/awkward pan on the top shelf. I step up on the bar that short people use to do said task. Next thing I know, I'm on the floor, and I'm catching the pan.

I'm still amazed that I'm not hurt.

I don't know if I can relay it to you in the same way that it felt or that it happened. All I can say is that there were soooo many strange things adding up to the fact that I didn't get hurt:

Floors slippery because they were just mopped. This enabled me to slide and end up on my back instead of actually falling down. This meant that the back of my head missed the stainless steel sink. Considering how quickly I fell, I would have at the very least knocked myself out. The first part of the fall happened so quickly that later I wondered if I hadn't partly blacked out. I can only guess that instinct took over instead of actually being afraid of the fall. The last part, the pan fell from the top shelf. ( These things can hurt you falling from the top like that ) I saw it falling towards me and I first thought to protect myself with my arms. But, I caught it. I'm still trying to figure out how I didn't break my leg on the steel bar, and how I didn't really get hurt. My back is a little sore, but I'm leaning that it's more because of a 10 hour work day than the fall.

Ah well. Very strange.

I am trying to get used to my routine again. I am not jumping back into it as easily as I thought I would. I seem to be exhausted when I get home. All I want to do is sit downnnnnn. and get off of my footsies. I don't even want to stand up inside the shower.

I am currently running my foot over a plastic body massager. ( the non phallic shaped/non battery-operated type that innocents like myself use) I'm like a monkey with a toy because its about as close to the much needed foot massage i'm gonna get.

Exhaustion 1
Hawk 0

it's 8:15 pm
i'm going to bed as soon as i check into my blue puffy socks that Pipsie bought me.

checked it's teeth

I believe that the lag is over. I woke up this morning without a problem. I didn't even stay for the snooze.

Excellent.

However, I do seem to have puffy eyes and tumble tummy. I didn't think I'd have a problem readjusting to the food here too. It's not like I can say that it tastes all that different. But my stomach knows the difference.

I might be relieved to get back home because of some pressing matters. And because I missed John, kitties and ferret. But, I do miss Scotland very much. I'm all messed up trying to cross the street on my way to work. It'll pass. I miss the little shops along the streets and the four story maze of stone buildings. The kids playing football in the park just outside the flat. The flat. Pipsie. Double decker busses. Bagpipers on Buchanan street.
The low and quickly moving clouds. Real green grass that is so soft it sinks just a bit when you step on it. (as opposed to the verigated crab grass thats around here.)

I'm sure you get the picture.

Anyhow, I am now the owner of a couch. John's brother flew in for a visit and will be staying until Wednesday. He was sleeping on the floor on a sleeping bag, and after work yesterday I went to go see if I could find a cheap fold up mattress, or camping bed at the thrift store. I totally scored. I didn't go in there for a couch because John had mentioned that he anted to go with me to look for one. But.... there it was in it's pleatherous/ hunter green glory. And it was only 10.00. I looked around it like a person looks at a horse. I checked it's teeth*. And behold, it was good. I still wasn't going to get it. But then, I sat down. And I swear that is probably the most comfortable couch I've ever sat on. I used the thrift store phone (saved a quarter, go me.) and called John, to which he was agreeable. So, now to get it home. Ummmm. Last I checked I had a Dodge Colt. Well, that Dodge Colt hauled a couch almost as big as it, home. The guy at the thrift store sat there and watched me tie it on the top with very much noted disbelief. "You might be ok if you don't start or stop too fast." I have very much faith in my tying skills, it's going nowhere. But I just smiled, and said, "Where there's a will, there's a way." But, you should have seen the people watch as I drove by, it was *hilarious*. Not the first or last time I'm sure people will think that I'm off my rocker. I resisted the urge to call the thrift store and tell them to tell the doubter (he works there) that I made it home safely.

So, now it's home, and my brother in law is sound asleep on it. At only ten dollars, I have no regret if I later toss it.

Life must be really good or really bad, when the highlight of your day is buying a 10.00 couch.

I'm outta here.
xxx

*seeing if you were paying attention. :P

Jumping on this wagon

Your element is Air. You are and artistic person
with a unique sense of style. You are
intelligent, constantly active and most likely
like to sing. Constantly moving the air is a
force of nature. One moment you can be a breeze
the next a tornado.


What's your element
brought to you by Quizilla

Let it Be

I was looking up tips for budgetting/ better time management/ and I came across two ingenius tips:

When away on a trip, water your houseplant by using an old water bottle. Poke the bottom of the bottle with several small holes. Place directly into the soil. The water will slowly leak into the soil.

If you drop off your film at a place that sends them out to another location for developing (usually cheaper): Write on an index card with your address and/or phone number on it. If the film is lost, then there will be less difficulty in finding it.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Yesterday was my first day back to work, and was it ever long. But it went well. Everyone was asking me about Scotland, and about my trip. James kept leaving his station to come back and talk to me. So much so, he got yelled at for it. My manager was very happy to see me. The first part of it went by relatively quickly. The second part was sooooooo slow.

Today is probably the day that I will have defeated the dreaded jet lag. All those random moments of sleep while travelling 30+ hours, were helpful at the time, but I paid for them last night at the end of my shift when I was dragging.

I am hoping to afford a small, basic use, digital camera. So that I can start taking miscellaneous pictures to share with everyone. I find myself wishing I could show all of you pictures of all my kitchen cabinet space, and my little backyard, and the leaves here which are changing.

In reflection of my travelling experience, I am pretty proud that I managed without much difficulty to get all the way home in the way that I did. I feel like it's something of an accomplishment even if I won't ever get a cookie for it.

This is how my trip home went:

Glasgow Airport Leave 7:10 PM
Arrive London Stansted 8:30 PM
Take Stansted Express Train to Liverpool Station (45 minutes)
Take London Underground to Paddington Stop (15 minutes)
Take Heathrow Express Train to Heathrow Airport (20-30 minutes)
Leave Heathrow Airport at 7:55 AM (Yes, that was about a 10 hour layover)
Arrive at JFK Airport at 10:00 AM EST
Take a bus from JFK Airport to the Subway Station
Take the A-train to Rockaway (there was some sort of technical problem)
Take the A-train to Manhattan Transit Authority Bus Station.
Take the Greyhound at 1:30 PM to Cleveland
Arrive in Cleveland at 10:00 PM
Depart Cleveland at 1:00 AM
Arrive Cincinnati at 6:30 AM

One funny thing I noticed when in the subway in NYC is there was a sign that said, "Pick a seat, then stay there" It was a message to people to tell them not to switch trains while the train was moving because it was very dangerous and potentially fatal. I had a wee laugh because I remembered last year when I visited NYC and Pat and I had to change cars several times while it was moving.
It's a good thing I didn't read that sign then because if I remember correctly I found it somewhat unnerving to do.

Well enough rambling
love you
xxx

blasted "R" word

I was going to stay home today, rest a bit, unpack at my liesure. I couldn't do it. I had to call work and ask them if I could come back two days early. It seems that I've missed work. They were more than happy to load me up with forty hours. And it seems like the extra cashola would be a good idea. I'm not so sure it was a great idea because I woke up at five a.m. this morning completely unable to go back to sleep. I don't like lag and it's accompanying dehydration headache. Bleah. Waaa. Waaa.

John has been awesome since I've come home. Yesterday he met me at the bus station with breakfast in tow. He called me three times from work, and he was just very attentive and helpful. We went and did laundry together last night. Oh the bliss of the cheap laundrymat.

After a relatively rough month cash wise I spent two hours talking to a bank represenative to accomplish nothing but file the disputes and get the customer service number. "Maybe they can help you."

Goodie! Goodie! Gum Drops.

( I am now in Customer Service Karma Reaping mode. All those years I worked for as a CSR, and was knowingly unsympathetic are coming back to haunt me. Because I'm sure that I'm not a difficult customer. Yes, I've sent food back to the kitchen because it didn't look like the menu. False advertising.)

I digress.

I was trying to get to the point of saying, "I've decided to become a miser/ Really pull the reins in on spending." I can pinch pennies with the best of them. When I want to. After being ever reminded at Pipsie's flat about the constant charge for energy in it's various forms. (No, Pipsie didn't remind me, the meter in her flat did.) And spending a whole month way too concerned about money, I've decided the only thing to do is take care of business, keep the bills up, and save a bit so that if anything happens we aren't nickel and dime-ing it. And in return, I'm not freaking out. Be more responsible.. Bleah, there's that blasted "R" word. Learn and move on.

I did manage to get a few things done yesterday. Make a wee dent in the unpacking pile. My previous living arrangement ended in an ubrupt and strange way. Susan's mom dropped off a bag of my stuff yesterday with a note in it saying that we still owed Susan 'X' amount. I swear that figure changes every fucking time. I would complain about the stuff that was not mine that was given to me (Susan was moving at the same time, she figured if she didn't want it, I might. I was out of the country so I didn't really get to see what was going on or veto anything.) And a couple of things that I wanted that didn't make their way here. But there are a few things that did make their way here that I really like. A nifty set of plastic patio furniture is at the top of the list. The next would be a very old cookbook. Which is very very cool considering that I now have a patio that is fenced in. It's great. I love my patio. So, I'll just start tossing if I have to.

I think that John and I'll be going to the storage unit very very soon since we are now without silverware and dishes. There's a lot here to do, and I'm trying not to focus on the really big pile, but on the fact that the pile gets smaller and smaller if I can manage to just keep doing one box at a time.

I could ramble on about this for a while, I'll be merciful and stop. I'm doing my own head in.
Love you

meanwhile, back at the ranch....

So, I am home and safe. I slept a bit here and there. I'll post more later, I just wanted to tell everyone I was safe and thank everyone for the safe journey wishes.

Expect catching up to commence within the week.

I feel really out of place. But I am sure it'll get better as soon as I get everything unpacked as everything needs unpacked since John moved while I was gone.

I love you guys.

Miss you D.

Don't cry for me Glasgow(ina)

Ok, not really poetic, but it was the best of the sucky journal titles I had.

Well, today I fly out of Glasgow and begin the journey home.
I am sad, but, I am ready to go home. I do have a husband after all, and a job.
I don't really want to think about how long it's going to take me home. Let's just say that I arrive back at 6 am EST WEDNESDAY.

argh.

I am going to miss Scotland, but I'll miss Pipsie much much more.

My current mission, should I chose to accept it... is to burn through three rolls of film with as much downtown Glasgow as I can manage. Unfortunately, the rain seems to have a different plan.

I thought I was leaving at 9 or later, but it appears that my flight leaves at 7:10 pm BST. Bleah. If Heathrow Airport had lockers, I'd stuff my suitcase in a locker and walk around London because I've got quite a layover in London, but that works with the plan of getting rid of jet lag. And hoping to sleep the whole flight. I hate turbulence, and it was turbulent on the way over here. Gotta find my rosary.

I am of course, going to get chips after I leave the internet cafe.

And, just to let the lot of you know, I intend on making a 2 year calendar with my 24 best pictures of Glasgow. You all need new calendars right?

I did have lovely weather for the day I spent at the Necropolis. The place is masssive. The monuments are massive and I just loved it. And, although I didn't get to go to the highlands, I found some heather in the graveyard. I picked a few sprigs coughelevencough of the heather to press and frame. I need to get one of the huge ivy leaves too from the church courtyard.

Last night, Pipsie and I went out with Sean and Sally. I really like hanging out with them. Its really easy to have good conversation. We were all talking about music, and such. I was really stoked that Sean knew who David Pirner was without me having to tell him about it.

I am certain to be all confused when crossing the street for the rest of my life. I have finally become used to looking right before left.

I am looking forward to catching up with everyone. Including my husband. Maybe he's missed me enough that he'll be willing to let me hang the new LOTR poster on the ceiling over my side of the bed. Probably not.

I think that I bring him with me on trips from now on. I miss him too. And I want to share things with him, not tell him about them. And I think that's really important.

I know that alot of you have only heard the down side of things with John and I. But I am hoping to eventually reintroduce him to everyone, and that the way things are now, and the way things will be with he and I will overshadow the past. And maybe you'll like him too..

But...
I reserve the right to still bitch about him. ;p

Love you all.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

p.s. Welcome freaky deaky, hope to catch up with you.

I'm too sexy for my hair...

So, still going with the frizz motif that my hair often persues when the humidity climbs the slightest notch. I just tried to harness that and put it in a 'tumbly do' (half up half down, encorporate frizz into the hairstyle, then it looks like you tried to do it.)

Right.

I have been enjoying the most delayed laugh in the world. You know the laugh, when someone tells a joke and you don't quite get it. It's funny, but not as funny as it is when you finally get it. Let me explain. Michiganders get locked in a graveyard Buffy references ensue. Now, nearly a year later, Hawk is laughing. 'Ohhhhh, I get it, I get it.'

I am really enjoying the commercials/ advertisements lately. The best commercials in the world have to be in the UK. Today, there was a toilet paper commercial that actually had a close up of someone's ass.

Today, I brought Sabrina out (the tripod... yes I've got a name for my camera too. got a problem with it :P?) Pipsie helped me name the tripod. It's a stuck up pain in my ass, so it needed a stuck up pain in the ass name.

Anyhow, I lose myself, I was saying... I have Sabrina out today and she and I are going to enjoy a break in the cloud cover when I climb to the top of the necropolis. I can't get enough of that place. I brought my headphones too so that I can listen to music, drink some diet coke, and play chicken with the cloud cover. (Wait for the blue to peek through.)

One thing that I enjoy is that no matter which bus I take, I can find my way around. I know where I am. It may not be the most direct route, but I make it and that's what counts.

I finally went into an art store I'd been avoiding yesterday. And they had beads.

beads beads beads beads beads beads beads.

I lovvvvvvvvvvvvvve beads.

I spent at least an hour in that place trying to make a decision (something I've recently discovered I'm not so good at. example: Pipsie: Where do you want to go? Me: ?? I don't care....wherever/whatever. Pipsie: Really, what do you want? Me: (mentally) Aakkkk. I don't care... but I'd reeeeeeeeally like some chips. )

I will venture there again today because I just didn't get enough beads... >:)

Finding the beads is actually a godsend because family members don't understand the whole, 'I didn't really have enough money to pick you up something.' Does not compute with them. Yes, the beads aren't that expensive, but this is truly a moment when 'the thought is really what matters'.

We watched Boogie Nights the other night. Pipsie couldn't get the widescreen to go widescreen format, so we watched it on TV format. We didn't care until the very end of the movie. When you realize that the part that gets cut is the ummm... 'star of the show'. And then we found a way to make that damned widescreen work.

I am in an excellent mood today, as my impersonation of Lionel Richie in the shower would indicate. Say you, Say me, never sounded so good. (Be thankful you don't have to see that. Feel bad that Pipsie may have heard that.) I think I'm a morning person after I get over the whole waking up thing. And I find that really really disgusting.

So, I'm off to get down with my bad self before Pipsie and I go out tonight.

love you all
xxxxxxxxx